生活大爆炸 第六季:第21集:博客(上)
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Oh, dear.Penny, have you been recording shows on our DVR again? No.
不是吧。佩妮， 你是不是又用我們的硬盤錄像機錄節(jié)目， 沒有啊
Answer honestly. This is not a trial. That'll come later.Absolutely not.
說實話就行了， 這又不是在審問你之后才會審問我絕對沒有
Help me out here. I can't afford another demerit.Yeah.
快幫幫我， 我不能再被他記過了。行
Uh... maybe we were hacked.
我們可能是被黑客攻擊了呢
You know, the Chinese have been hacking everything lately.
中國那邊最近不是在到處網(wǎng)絡(luò)攻擊嗎
Why would the Chinese make our DVR record Paul Blart: Mall Cop?
他們?yōu)樯兑谖覀兊匿浵駲C來錄《百貨戰(zhàn)警》
I don't know. It's a fat guy on a Segway. That's funny everywhere.
我也不知道?？磁肿域T電動代步車， 哪國人都會覺得好笑
I'm deleting it.Well, hang on.
我要把它刪了。先別刪啊
Maybe the Chinese haven't finished watching it yet.
那中國黑客可能還沒看完呢
You know, if you're trying to make space on the DVR, why don't you just get rid of some of the stuff you've already watched?
如果錄像機空間不夠， 要刪東西你怎么不把那些你看過的影片給刪了啊
Like, um... Alphas.No, that's the season two finale.
比如《阿爾法戰(zhàn)士》。不行， 這是它的第二季季末集呢
That was quite the cliffhanger. I'm going to rewatch it before season three starts.
最后留了個大懸念。第三季開始前我要再溫習(xí)一遍劇情
There is no season three. They canceled that show.Well, they can't cancel it.
不會有第三季， 這劇被砍了。他們不能砍這個劇
It ended on a cliffhanger.
季末留了大懸念呢
They did. Uh, Sheldon, there are two dumplings left. Do you want them? Dumplings?
他們就是砍了， 謝爾頓，還剩兩個水餃， 你要吃嗎？還水餃
Don't you understand what's going on here? As a rule, no.
你沒懂現(xiàn)在情況多嚴重嗎？想也知道， 沒懂
That show ended with all the residents of New York either dead or unconscious.
這劇季末劇情演到， 全紐約居民全死或是全昏迷了
Now I'll never know what happened.
現(xiàn)在我沒機會知道后續(xù)發(fā)展了
Well, why don't you make up your own ending?
你怎么不自己編個后續(xù)出來呢
Oh, sure, what a wonderful idea.
行啊， 這主意太棒了
And after that,I'll make up my own rules of oral hygiene.
我編完之后干脆再自編個口腔衛(wèi)生規(guī)矩好了
You know, instead of flossing, I'll rub pudding on my gums.
例如以后再也不剔牙， 而是把布丁涂牙齦上
I'm going to get the number of the SyFy Channel and give them what for.
我要找出科幻臺的電話給他們點教訓(xùn)
Oh, please, don't do that. No. They can't just cancel a show like Alphas.
求你了， 別這樣。一定要， 他們怎么能砍了這樣的劇呢
You know? They have to help the viewers let go.
他們應(yīng)該幫助觀眾放手才對啊
Firefly did a movie to wrap things up.
《螢火蟲》出了電影版來收尾
Buffy the Vampire Slayer continued on as a comic book.
《吸血鬼獵人巴菲》以漫畫繼續(xù)延伸了下去
Heroes gradually lowered the quality season by season till we were grateful it ended.
《英雄》的劇情一季比一季爛到結(jié)尾時， 觀眾還感到慶幸呢
I feel bad for whoever gets that phone call.Ah, don't.
我替要接到他電話的人感到難過。不需要
If they didn't want to be yelled at by crazy nerds,they shouldn't have started a SciFi channel.
要是不想接到瘋狂宅男粉的斥責(zé)電話那他們當初就不應(yīng)該開這個科幻臺
I think you're gonna be really happy with this security camera.
你之后一定會對這個攝像頭感到十分滿意
The optics are great, it's got infrared technology,and there's even a backup battery when the power goes out.
鏡頭很棒還有內(nèi)置紅外線技術(shù)而且還附帶備用電池， 停電時也能運作
Whatever. I can see my little princess while I'm at work, right?
都行啦。反正我能在上班時看到我的小公主， 對吧
Why can't you just watch porn like a regular guy?
你不能像個正常男人那樣上班偷看黃片嗎
I need your laptop so I can configure the software.Wait, hold on.
把你的電腦給我， 我得調(diào)試下軟件。等等
This is weird.What? I was Googling that girl I've been dating, and I found her blog.Cool.
奇了怪了。怎么了？我剛在網(wǎng)上搜我對象的資料然后找到了她的博客。厲害
Anything juicy? She said she recently went on a date with a guy named Roger?
有"有料"的內(nèi)容嗎？她說最近在跟一個叫羅杰的人約會
And he's Indian? And he's an astrophysicist, too?
他還是印度人？而且他也是個天體物理學(xué)家
You know what's going on, don't you?
你知道這是怎么回事吧
Yes. Mummy was right.
沒錯， 我媽說得太對了
American girls are sexually voracious devils.
美國的女人全都是淫蕩饑渴騷貨
I can't believe I have to explain this.
沒想到我居然得跟你解釋這事
People change names on blogs to protect their privacy. Roger is Raj.
很多人都會在博客上用假名來保持隱私。羅杰就是拉杰
I always thought, if I had a white name, it would be Gavin.
我一直以為， 如果我要有個白人名那我會叫蓋倫
Keep reading. What does it say?
繼續(xù)讀啊， 看她都說了啥
No, no, I don't know if I should.
不行不行， 這不太好吧
If she wanted me to know about her blog, she would've told me.
如果她想我知道她有博客， 早就告訴我了
It's almost like I'm reading her diary.
這就跟偷看她日記一樣
That's exactly what it's like. Keep reading.
這就是偷看她日記啊， 繼續(xù)讀
No, this is creepy.
不行， 這太沒節(jié)操了
Oh, I think we were looking at creepy in the rearview mirror when I put up that camera.
從我?guī)湍惆惭b好攝像頭的那一刻起節(jié)操就已成路人了
It's not creepy. Don't listen to him.
我們正常得很， 別聽他瞎說
Oh, look who's got the sweetest kisses.Should I go?
瞧呀， 哪個小姑娘的親親這么香啊。要讓你們獨處嗎
With all the TV Sheldon was talking about, I had the greatest idea ever.
在聽完謝爾頓說了這么多電視劇后我有了一個絕妙的好主意
It even blows away my idea for a Star Wars themed coffee shop called "Brewbacca's."
比我要開名為"楚巴咖啡廳"星戰(zhàn)主題咖啡廳的主意還棒（楚巴卡是星球大戰(zhàn)里的知名角色）
You need to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
那就是讓你看《吸血鬼獵人巴菲》
It is the perfect show for the two of us.
這劇超適合我們情侶一同觀賞
It's got action and jokes and hot vampires and romance. I cannot oversell this!
集火爆動作與搞笑一體有性感吸血鬼加浪漫愛情， 怎么夸都不過分
What do you say?
你怎么說
It's 6:30 in the morning.
現(xiàn)在是清晨六點半
I thought you grew up on a farm.
你不是在農(nóng)場長大的嗎
Hello, SyFy Network?
你好， 科幻臺嗎
Yeah, this is your vice president of programming.
我是你們的節(jié)目安排副總裁
Now, we have made a horrible mistake regarding Alphas.
對于《阿爾法戰(zhàn)士》 我們做了重大錯誤決定
Yeah, we need to uncancel it immediately.
我們要立刻反取消節(jié)目
Well, you just put me through to the people who handle that, you tell them it's me,and I don't want to answer a lot of questions about if I really am who I say I am, you know?
總之誰負責(zé)這個， 你就把電話轉(zhuǎn)給誰告訴他們我是誰我不想回答一大堆關(guān)于我是不是真是我自己所說的這個人的問題
I just... I want this done.
我就是要把這事兒解決了
No, I am not the person who just called.
不， 我不是剛才打來電話的人
That man was clearly a cowboy.
那個人很顯然是個牛仔
Yeah, who was plumb concerned about y'all canceling his favorite show.
對， 他只是單純地關(guān)心你們?nèi)∠怂钕矏鄣碾娨晞?/div>
Why do they keep hanging up on me?
他們?yōu)槭裁纯偸菕煳译娫?/div>
I'm sorry you're upset.
很遺憾你這么難過
You know, Sheldon, sometimes people seek the comfort of physical contact in moments like this.
知道嗎， 謝爾頓， 在這種時刻有些人會尋求身體接觸帶來的安慰
I am not flying back to Texas just so my mom can give me a hug.Okay.
我才不會飛回德州就為了讓我媽抱一下。好吧
Well, what I think is going on here is you have a pathological need for closure.Oh, that's nonsense.
我覺得你現(xiàn)在的情況是對于"結(jié)局" 你有種病態(tài)的需求真是胡說
I mean, you tell me stories about your day all the time.
你總是告訴我你的日常生活瑣碎事
I don't care how they end.
我根本不關(guān)心結(jié)局是什么
You know, I might be able to help you with this.
也許我能幫你
There's a whole field of behavioral neuroscience that examines ways to retrain your neural pathways so stuff like this bothers you less.
在行為神經(jīng)學(xué)方面有一個領(lǐng)域研究如何重新訓(xùn)練神經(jīng)通路然后這樣的事情便不會如此困擾你了
Yeah, but I just told you, I don't have a problem with closure.
但我剛剛對你說了我才沒糾結(jié)要有結(jié)局的問題
You sure about that? Oh, quite sure. That proves nothing.
你確定嗎？相當確定這不能證明什么
Ready to go to lunch? Do you think I'm feminine? Yeah. Let's go.
可以去吃午飯了嗎？你覺得我這人很女性化嗎？是的， 我們走
Thanks a lot.What's going on?
多謝你了。怎么了
I broke down, and I read Lucy's blog.
我沒忍住， 我看了露西的博客
And in one of the entries, she said, when we first met, I struck her as a little feminine.
其中有一段她說， 我們初次見面時她覺得我這人有一點點女性氣質(zhì)
Just a little? That's great. I have to talk to her about this.
才覺得一點點而已， 很好啊。我得跟她談?wù)勥@個
Oh, geez, why do you girls always want to talk about things?
老天， 為什么你們女生總要談這談那
Listen to me,if she's writing about your relationship,use it to your advantage.
聽我說如果她寫了你們感情方面的內(nèi)容你就好好利用啊
Rig the game.Well, that doesn't seem fair.
操縱游戲。這似乎不公平吧
Is it fair that girls like confident, normal guys more than nervous weirdos?
難道女生喜歡自信正常的男生多過緊張古怪男， 這樣就公平嗎
No, it's not. I've always thought that was unfair.
這不公平。我一直覺得這不公平
So take what's in that blog and use it to get her pants off.
那就利用博客里的內(nèi)容， 讓她寬衣解褲帶
Why do you have to make everything so filthy?
為什么話從你的嘴里出來， 就這樣下流
Why couldn't you just say the blog is like her giving me the key to her heart?
你為什么不能說博客就像是她給了我一把打開她心門的鑰匙
"The key to her heart."That's nice.
"打開她心門的鑰匙"真不錯
Were you quoting someone or is it tattooed on the small of your back?
這話是你引用別人的還是你腰上的娘們紋身
I was quoting a man who knows a thing or two about women:
我在引用對女人略知一二的男人的話
Sir Elton John. So, did you love it?
艾爾頓o約翰爵士（著名同性戀歌手）你喜歡嗎？
Of course you loved it. How could you not love it?
你當然喜歡了， 你怎么會不喜歡呢
Tell me how much you loved it. It was cute.
告訴我你有多喜歡。很可愛
Oh, don't say cute.That's the worst.
別說可愛啊。這個詞最差勁了
What's wrong with cute?
可愛怎么不對了
It just makes things seem small.
這樣一形容就覺得東西小小的
It diminishes them.
有種渺小的感覺
So you want me to stop calling your little tushy cute?
你這是要我不再說你的小屁屁可愛嗎
You can try, but nobody's gonna believe you.
你可以不說啊， 不過沒人會相信你
I just... I don't understand how you can watch a show that great and not be excited by it.
我只是不理解， 為什么看這么優(yōu)秀的電視劇你卻一點也不激動
I liked it. I'm excited.
我喜歡， 我很激動
Well, then, tell your face.
那你的表情就配合一下啊
What do you want from me?
你想讓我怎么樣
You know what?
這樣吧
Never mind. We gave it a shot.
算了， 我們嘗試過了
Let's just see what else is on.
看看有什么其它節(jié)目吧
Oh, come on, don't be like that.
拜托， 別這樣嘛
I'm sorry I called it cute.
抱歉我說了可愛
Let's watch another one. Really?
我們再看一集， 真的嗎
Yeah, it was fun.
對， 挺有意思的
Kind of reminded me of my high school.
讓我想起了高中時代
But instead of vampires, we had meth heads.
但我們沒有吸血鬼， 只有嗑藥鬼
But both came out at night and had messed up teeth.All right, cool.
但兩者都是夜晚冒出來， 而且都是一口爛牙好吧
II think you'll like the next one better.
我覺得你會更喜歡下一集
All the cheerleaders are suffering from an evil curse.
講的是啦啦隊員們遭受邪惡詛咒之苦
Oh. Well, that's like my high school, too.
這點也很像高中
But instead of a curse, it was crabs.
不過不是詛咒， 是陰虱之苦
I've come up with a series of exercises to help with your compulsive need for closure.
我準備了一系列練習(xí)幫你克服對收尾的強迫需求
I take issue with the word "compulsive."
我不喜歡"強迫"這個詞
All I'm saying is,we live in a world where closure isn't always an op.....Tion. Okay..
我的意思是我們生活的這個世界里， 結(jié)局并不是一定...會有的， 好吧
For the sake of argument, let's say I have a problem.
為了論證這點， 就先假設(shè)我是有問題
What would be your plan for addressing it?
那你要如何證明我有問題呢
I'm going to recondition your brain so that the need for completion isn't so overwhelming.
我要重建你的大腦思路讓這種對結(jié)局的需求得以抑制
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