support
There are two ways to spreading light :to be the candle or the mirror that reflect it !
傳播光明的方法有兩種:要么做一根蠟燭,要么做一面鏡子去反射它的光芒!
you support someone when you willingly step forward to help him through a challengning time ,yet the great irony is that when you support others ,you are also ,in fact ,supporting yourself .when you withhold support from others ,it is usually an indicator that you are also withholding support from yourself .
當(dāng)他人身處困境的時候,你主動幫助他渡過難關(guān),你就是在支持他,或者你不會想到,你在支持他人的時候 ,你也在幫助你自己 , 拒絕對他人施以援手,其實(shí)也是拒絕幫助自己。
we are most often to called upon to support others in friendship .one of my acquaintances,Donna ,told me a story recently that clearly illustrates the magic of support and its potential as an emotional mirror.
朋友之間是需要相互支持的,前幾天,我的一位熟人唐納給我講述了一個故事,故事清晰的闡明了支持的魔力以及作為情感之境的潛在效應(yīng)。
several years ago,Donna had been feeling very depressed,she had just broken up with her boyfriend of two years and she was having a very difficult time to accept the loss. she had been laid up with a knee injury for severy days,and the time alone at home certainly was not helping, her misery was only compounded by her frustration at herself for not being able to pull it together and stop crying all the time.
幾年前,唐娜一直委靡不振,那時和她相戀兩年的男朋友剛剛分手,這讓她難以承受,接著她又因膝蓋受傷臥床數(shù)日,當(dāng)然孤獨(dú)在家的日子對她的身心毫無益處,她無法控制這種局面,因而,痛苦不尷,整天懊惱,傷心,淚流滿面.
Early one morning ,Donna received a phone call with some terrible news: her best friend's brother was killed in a car accident,Donna had known her friend and her brother for nearly her entire life ,and the news was devastating. however ,Donna quickly pulled herself together,got in the car ,and drove to her friend's house to be there with her
一天清晨,唐娜接到她最好的朋友的電話,她的弟弟在一場車禍中死去了,這一噩耗讓唐娜悲慟萬分,要知道,唐娜與他們有著多年的交情,可以算得上是一生的朋友,唐娜很快振作起來,立刻開車前往朋友家陪他。
Over the course of next few days, admist the haze of the funeral and hundreds of visitors, Donna was 100%present for her friend,she held her close while she cried endless tears, sat by her side as the waves of grig\fe washed over her friend. and slept on the floor next to her friend's bed to make sure she did not wake up alone in the middle of the night. during that time she hardly feel any pain at all in her knee and none of the depression she had been experiencing
出事后的幾天里,在張羅朋友弟弟的葬禮和接待來訪者期間,唐娜總是陪在朋友身邊,寸步不離,朋友痛不欲生的時候,唐娜僅僅的摟著她,朋友悲慟萬分的時候,唐娜給她以慰藉,為了不讓朋友在半夜驚醒后肚子黯然傷神,唐娜就睡在她旁邊的地板上,那段時間里,唐娜全然忘記了身邊的疼痛,心中的傷痛沉寂下來。
several weeks later,when life began to return ro normal, Donna realized that the level of support she had given her friend far exceeded any support she had offered herself during her dark time.she was able to use the support she had given her friend as a mirror for the support she has been withhold from herself,she realized that her own tears required as much attention and nurturing from her as anyone else's and that if she could give it to another ,she must be able to also give it to herself ....
之后幾周,一切都回歸常態(tài),這時,唐娜才意識到,在這段陰暗的日子里,她給予朋友的支持遠(yuǎn)與多與給予自己的,她幾乎沒有主動幫助自己擺脫困境,她覺得自己也同樣需要他人的關(guān)愛和支持,并且,她能給予別人關(guān)愛和支持,就一定能給予自己。
so ,when you find yourself unable to support someone else ,look within and see if perhaps there is something within yourself that you are not supporting ,conversely ,when you give complete support to others ,it will mirror those places within you that require the same level of attention
所以,當(dāng)你發(fā)現(xiàn)自己無法給予他人關(guān)懷的時候,自習(xí)審視自己吧,看自己是否某些地方拒絕給予支持,反過來,如果你能全心全意地關(guān)懷他人,你就會發(fā)現(xiàn)這些地方,你也同樣需要關(guān)愛。
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