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書蟲5級《純真年代》5. 梅讓紐蘭大感意外

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2022年07月24日

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5. MAY SURPRISES NEWLAND

At Highbank Newland was a dutiful guest until lunch on Sunday, when he borrowed a carriage and drove over to Skuytercliff.

The van der Luydens' large country house never looked particularly welcoming, and now in the depths of winter it looked even less so. The servant who opened the door explained that Mrs van der Luyden and the Countess were at church. Newland said he would walk to the church to meet the ladies.

And as he walked along the path, he was delighted to see a figure in a red coat coming towards him. He hurried forward, and Madame Olenska stopped short with a smile of welcome.

Ah, you've come!' she said, giving him her hand. 'Mrs van der Luyden has gone on to visit some friends, so I'm alone. '

The red coat made her look brilliantly pretty, like the Ellen of the old days. He replied, 'I came to see what you were running away from.'

Her smile disappeared, but she answered, 'You'll see soon. 'She added, more cheerfully, 'What does it matter, now that you're here to protect me?'

The blood rose to his face and he caught the sleeve of her coat. 'Ellen, what is it? You must tell me.'

Oh, let's run a race first! My feet are freezing!' And she ran away from him, her red coat bright against the snow. Newland started after her, and they met, laughing, under a tree.

She looked up at him and smiled. 'I knew you'd come.'

Ellen looked up at Newland and smiled. 'I knew you'd come.'

That shows you wanted me to,' he replied, his heart beating wildly with delight.

They walked along together. The ground seemed to sing under their feet, and there was a mysterious brightness in the air.

May asked you to take care of me,' she said after a while.

I didn't need any asking.'

Ah – what a poor, helpless, defenceless thing you must all think I am! But women here seem not to feel the need.'

He lowered his voice to ask, 'What sort of need?'

Ah, don't ask me! I don't speak your language.'

He stood still on the path, looking down at her. 'What did I come for, if I don't speak yours?'

Oh, my friend...!' She laid her hand lightly on his arm.

Ellen, why won't you tell me what's happened?'

I will tell you, but where? One can't be alone for a minute in that enormous house, with servants always in and out of every room! Is there nowhere in an American house where one may be by oneself? You're all so shy and yet so public at the same time.'

Ah, you don't like us!' said Newland sadly.

Just then they passed an ancient stone house, called the Patroon's house, which the first owner of Skuytercliff had built and lived in, three hundred years before. The van der Luydens kept it to show to their visitors as a place of historical interest.

What luck!' cried Ellen. 'We can go in and have a quiet talk. Someone's even lit a fire. No one will disturb us there.'

They went in and sat down by a bright fire.

When you wrote to me, you were unhappy,' said Newland, watching her expressive face.

Yes, I was. But I can't feel unhappy when you're here.'

I shan't be here very long.' His lips felt stiff with the effort of saying just so much and no more.

I know. But I live in the moment when I'm happy. I don't look ahead.'

The words stole through him like a temptation. He got up and stood looking out through the window, with his back to her. What if she had been running away from him, and she had waited to tell him until they were alone together in this secret place?

Ellen, please tell me. Tell me who you're running away from.'

For a long moment she was silent, and in that moment Newland imagined her, almost heard her, stealing up behind him to throw her light arms around his neck. But while he waited, his whole mind and body ready for that wonderful thing to happen, he saw a heavily-coated man walking along the path to the house. The man was Julius Beaufort.

Ah!' said Newland, bursting into a laugh. 'So that's it?'

Madame Olenska ran to his side, slipping her hand into his, but when she saw Beaufort, her face went pale. 'I didn't know he was here,' she whispered. Her hand still held Newland's, but he drew away from her and, walking into the hall, threw open the door of the little house. 'Come in, Beaufort, this way! Madame Olenska is expecting you!' he said.

During his journey back to New York the next day, Newland thought bitterly of Beaufort. He was clearly the man Ellen was running away from. He was chasing her, and Julius Beaufort only ever had one purpose in mind when chasing pretty women.

The next two or three days went by very slowly. There were moments when Newland felt he was being buried alive under his future. He heard nothing from Ellen until the fourth evening, when a note from her arrived at his house. It said simply:

Come late tomorrow. I must explain to you. Ellen

The young man spent all night thinking about the note. There were several ways of answering it. The reply he finally decided on, at sunrise, was to pack a bag with some clothes and jump on a boat which was leaving that day for Florida.

When he walked down the sandy main street of St Augustine and saw May Welland standing there with the sun in her hair, he wondered why he had waited so long to come. Here was truth, here was reality, here was the life that belonged to him!

Newland – has anything happened?' she asked.

Yes – I found I had to see you.' he replied, and she blushed happily. They sat down on a bench under some orange trees, and he put his arm round her waist and kissed her. It was like drinking from a cool mountain stream on a hot summer's day.

He explained to May's parents that he had come because he felt he might be getting a cold. Mr Welland understood all anxiety over health only too well, and insisted he should stay at least a week with them, to prevent any possible illness taking hold.

He walked and read and went boating with May in the warm Florida sunshine. All the time he was thinking about their wedding, which seemed unimaginably far away.

The day before he left, they were walking through the orange trees again, when suddenly he burst out, 'Can't you understand, May? I want to make our dreams real! I want you to be my wife, now rather than later, this year rather than next!'

For a moment May was silent. Then, clear-eyed, she looked straight at him. 'I'm not sure I do understand. Is it – is it because you're not certain of continuing to care for me?'

Newland was shocked into saying, 'My God – perhaps – I don't know!' Both were silent for a moment.

If that is it – then, is there someone else? let us talk honestly, Newland. I've felt a difference in you since our engagement was announced.'

My dear, what madness!' he managed to say.

It won't hurt us to talk about it. You could so easily have made a mistake – anyone can.'

If I had made a mistake of the kind you suggest, is it likely I would be begging you to marry me sooner?'

She thought for a moment. 'Yes.' she said at last. 'You might want to decide the matter, once and for all.'

Her calm intelligence took his breath away, but he could see how painful this was for her. She continued, 'You know, a girl sees more than her parents imagine. I've always known there was someone in your past. I saw her once – her face was sad and I felt sorry for her – and I remembered that when we got engaged.'

My dear child – is that all? If you only knew the truth!'

Then there is a truth I don't know?'

I mean, the truth about that old story.'

But that's what I want to know. Newland, I couldn't build my happiness on a wrong done to another woman! I understand that when two people really love each other, they might have to go against public opinion. And if you feel yourself in any way – promised to that woman – and if there is any way you can keep your word – even by her getting a divorce, then, Newland, don't give her up because of me!'

He had never admired May so much as at that moment. How brave of her to speak so plainly, and how generous to offer to give him up to his former mistress! But with all her intelligence, she had not seen what was troubling him.

There was no promise of the kind you think. But I love you for saying that. I mean, every woman's right to her freedom—'He stopped, surprised by the direction his thoughts were taking.

May turned her blushing face towards him, and as he bent to kiss her, he saw her eyes were full of happy tears. For a moment he had seen a woman who could think for herself, a woman who was prepared to break away from society's rules. But the next moment he was disappointed to see the old, dutiful May return. She seemed to be aware of his disappointment, but without knowing what to do about it. They walked silently home.

Two days after his return to New York, Newland called on old Mrs Manson Mingott, to persuade her to use her influence with the Wellands about an early wedding date for him and May. She was amused by his urgency, and agreed to help. The Countess, who was visiting her grandmother, was also there, and listened thoughtfully to this conversation. Newland had a few minutes alone with her, when she walked with him to the front door.

When can I see you?' he asked in a low voice.

Whenever you like, but it must be soon if you want to see the little house again. I'm moving next week.'

For a moment he was back again in the exotic atmosphere of her sitting room. 'Tomorrow evening?' he asked.

Tomorrow, yes, but come early. I'm going out later.'

It was only half-past eight when he arrived at her house. In the sitting room he found Medora Manson, Ellen's aunt, who had just arrived back from a long trip to Cuba. She greeted him, and while they waited for Ellen to join them, told him she had a letter from the Count to give to her niece. 'Yes, my poor, foolish Olenski,' she added, 'all he asks is to take her back as his wife!'

Good God!' cried Newland, jumping up.

You are horrified? Of course I do not defend him. But just think what she is giving up if she stays here! Palaces, jewels, art, priceless furniture, music, brilliant conversation – forgive me, my dear young man, but one does not find that here. The truth is, Mr Archer, I have heard of your influence over dear Ellen, and I hoped I might count on your support – to persuade you...'

That she ought to go back? I would rather see her dead!' cried the young man violently.

Ah,' said Mrs Manson calmly. 'Am I to understand you prefer that?' She pointed to a huge bunch of expensive flowers on the sofa, with Beaufort's card just visible. 'After all, marriage is marriage... and my niece is still a wife...'

At that moment Ellen appeared in the doorway.

We were saying, my dear,' smiled Mrs Manson, 'here is something a fond admirer has sent you.'

Madame Olenska turned, saw the flowers, and a silent anger seemed to run through her. She rang for her servant and told her to take them to a neighbour who was ill. 'Take them at once!' she cried. 'I don't want them in the house!' She turned to Newland. 'Mr Archer, my aunt is just leaving. Would you take her to the carriage? I'll leave myself when the carriage comes back.'

When he returned, the Countess was sitting by the fire.

Your aunt thinks you will go back to your husband,' he said.

Many cruel things have been believed of me.'

Oh Ellen – forgive me – I'm a fool!'

I know you have your own troubles. You think the Wellands are unreasonable about your marriage, and of course I agree with you.' He realized she was changing the subject.

Yes. I went south to ask May to shorten the engagement. We had an honest talk, our first, in fact. She thinks my impatience is a bad sign. She thinks it means I want to marry her at once to get away from someone whom I – care for more.'

But if she thinks that, why isn't she in a hurry too?'

Because she's not like that. She's so much nobler. She has offered to give me up, for the other woman.'

Madame Olenska looked into the fire for some time. Down the quiet street Newland could hear her horses returning.

That is noble,' she said.

Yes. But I don't intend to marry anyone else.'

Ah.' There was another long pause. 'This other woman – does she love you?'

Oh, there's no other woman. I mean, the person May was thinking of was never—'

Then why, after all, are you in such a hurry to marry?'

There's your carriage,' said Newland.

Yes, I should go. I am expected at Mrs Struthers'. I must go where I am invited, or I shall be too lonely.' She smiled a little.

Newland did not want her to leave. 'May guessed the truth,' he said. 'There is another woman – but not the one she thinks.'

She did not answer, and did not move. He sat down beside her and took her hand. But she jumped up and freed her hand.

Don't make love to me! Too many men have done that!'

It was the bitterest thing she could have said to him.

I have never made love to you, and I never shall. But you are the woman I would have married if it had been possible.'

You are the woman I would have married if it had been possible,' said Newland.

But it's you who've made it impossible!' she cried.

He stared at her, his mind full of darkness in which there was a single point of blinding light.

I've made it impossible?'

You, you, you!' Her lips were trembling. 'You made me give up the idea of divorce, to spare my family the publicity, the scandal. And because my family was going to become your family, I did what you told me. I did it for you, and for May!'

Good God!' he cried. 'And I thought... oh, don't ask me what I thought!'

She blushed deeply. 'But I do ask you.'

There were accusations in your husband's letter...'

I had nothing to fear from that letter, absolutely nothing! All I feared was to bring scandal on the family, on you and May.'

Good God!' he cried again, putting his face in his hands.

The silence that followed lay on them like a gravestone, and it seemed to Newland that nothing would ever lift that load from his heart. He did not move, or raise his head from his hands.

At least I loved you!' he said, out of the darkness.

On the other side of the room, he heard a sound like a child crying softly. He ran to her.

Ellen! What madness is this? Why are you crying? Nothing's done that can't be undone. I'm still free, and you're going to be.' He had her in his arms, her face like a wet flower at his lips. Why, oh why, had he stood for five minutes arguing with her across the room, when just touching her made everything so simple?

She gave him back all his kiss, but after a moment he felt her stiffening in his arms, and she put him aside.

Ah, my poor Newland – I suppose this had to happen. But it doesn't change things in the least.'

It changes the whole of life for me.'

No, it mustn't, it can't. You're engaged to May Welland, and I'm married to the Count.'

Newland stood up. 'Nonsense! It's too late for that sort of thing. We've no right to lie to other people or ourselves.'

You say that because it's the easiest thing to say at the moment. In reality it's too late to do anything but what we'd both decided on. You see, from the very beginning I realized how kind, how noble you were. Very good people don't impress me – I feel they've never been tempted. But you know, you understand, you've felt the world outside, tempting you with its golden hands – and yet you won't accept happiness bought with cruelty. That's better, nobler, than anything I've ever known.'

She spoke quietly, without tears, and each word burnt its way into Newland's heart. 'Don't let us undo what you've done!' she cried. 'I can't go back now to that other way of thinking. I can't love you unless I give you up.'

They remained, facing each other, divided by the distance her words had created. Suddenly, he was angry. 'And Beaufort? Is he to replace me? You're seeing him this evening, aren't you?'

I shall not go out this evening,' she said calmly.

You tell me you're lonely – I've no right to keep you from your friends,' he said bitterly.

I shan't be lonely now. I was lonely, I was afraid. But the emptiness and darkness are gone now.'

He turned away, with a sense of complete exhaustion.

At that moment the doorbell rang, and a minute later the servant came in with a telegram for the Countess. It said:

GRANDMOTHER'S TELEGRAM SUCCESSFUL. PARENTS AGREE WEDDING AFTER EASTER. TOO HAPPY FOR WORDS AND LOVE YOU DEARLY. YOUR GRATEFUL MAY

Half an hour later, when Newland unlocked his own front door, he found a similar telegram waiting for him in the hall, saying:

PARENTS AGREE WEDDING TUESDAY AFTER EASTER GRACE CHURCH. SO HAPPY. LOVE MAY

He started laughing wildly and could not stop. He was making so much noise that his sister came out of her bedroom.

Newland, whatever is the matter? It's very late!'

Nothing's the matter, Janey, except that I'm going to be married in a month!'

Janey fell on his neck and pressed him to her thin chest. 'Oh, Newland, how wonderful! I'm so glad! But why do you keep on laughing? Do stop, or you'll wake Mother.'

* * *

dutiful adj. doing what you are expected to do and behaving in a loyal and obedient way 盡本分的,恭順的

the depths of winter the middle of winter, especially when it is very cold 隆冬

freezing adj. very cold 極冷的

defenceless adj. weak and unable to protect yourself from attack or harm 無防衛(wèi)能力的,無助的

historical adj. relating to the past 歷史的

stiff adj. firm, hard, or difficult to bend 硬的

temptation n. the desire to do something that you know is wrong 誘惑

bitterly adv. in a way that someone or something makes you very unhappy, or shows that you are very unhappy 憤恨地

sunrise n. the time when the sun first appears in the morning 黎明,拂曉

unimaginably adv. in a way that is hard to imagine 不能想象地

burst out to suddenly say something in a forceful way 突然說出,大聲喊叫

once and for all if you deal with something once and for all, you deal with it completely and finally 一勞永逸地,一次了結(jié)地

take one's breath away to be extremely exciting 使某人驚訝得透不過氣來

public opinion the opinions or beliefs that ordinary people have about a particular subject 公眾輿論

plainly adv. honestly, and without trying to hide the truth 坦率地

think for oneself to have ideas and thoughts of your own rather than believing what other people say 獨(dú)立思考

priceless adj. extremely valuable 無價的,稀世之珍的

count on to depend on someone or something, especially in a difficult situation 指望,依靠

doorway n. the space where a door opens into a room or building 門道,門口

shorten v. to make something shorter 縮短

noble adj. being courageous and honest, thinking about other people 高尚的

blinding adj. so bright or strong that you cannot see properly 炫目的,使人眼花繚亂的

publicity n. the attention that someone or something gets from newspapers, television etc 輿論

gravestone n. a stone above a grave showing details of the person buried there 墓碑石

stiffen v. if you stiffen, your body suddenly becomes firm, straight, or still because you feel angry or anxious 變得繃緊

replace v. to start doing something instead of another person, or start being used instead of another thing 取代

emptiness n. a feeling of great sadness and loneliness 空虛

exhaustion n. extreme tiredness 精疲力竭

Easter n. a Christian holy day in March or April when Christians remember the death of Christ and his return to life 復(fù)活節(jié)

5. 梅讓紐蘭大感意外

在海班克,紐蘭一直是位盡本分的客人。直至周日午餐過后,他才借了一輛馬車,駕車前往斯庫特克利夫。

范德盧頓夫婦的鄉(xiāng)間大宅從不讓人覺得特別舒適,而此時正值隆冬,越發(fā)顯得冰冷。開門的用人告訴紐蘭,范德盧頓太太和伯爵夫人去做禮拜了。紐蘭說他會步行去教堂見兩位夫人。

沿著小路走時,他瞥見一個穿著紅色大衣的身影正朝自己走來,不由欣喜萬分。他急忙趕上前去,奧蘭斯卡夫人不由立即止住腳步,微笑相迎。

“啊,你來了!”她說著向他伸出手,“范德盧頓太太還要去拜訪幾位朋友,所以就我一個人了。”

紅色大衣讓埃倫顯得格外漂亮,很像從前的她。他回答說:“我來看看你在逃避些什么。”

她的笑容消失了,不過她回答說:“你很快就會明白。”之后,她稍為露出歡容,補(bǔ)充道:“現(xiàn)在有你在這里保護(hù)我,那又有什么關(guān)系呢?”

他漲紅了臉,抓住她的衣袖問:“埃倫,出什么事了?你必須告訴我。”

“哦,我們先來一次賽跑!我的腳都要凍僵了!”她從他身邊跑開,紅色大衣在白雪的映襯下非常耀眼。紐蘭在她身后追趕,在一棵樹下追上了她,兩人笑了起來。

她抬頭望著他,笑著說:“我就知道你會來。”

“那說明你希望我來。”他回答說,心因?yàn)橄矏偠裉灰选?/p>

他們一起往前踱步。大地仿佛在他們腳下歡唱,天空閃耀著一種神秘的光彩。

過了一會兒,她說:“梅要求你照顧我的。”

“我用不著誰來要求。”

“啊——你們所有人一定把我想得太可憐、太無助、太不能保護(hù)自己了!不過,這兒的女人好像并沒有這種需要。”

他沉聲問:“什么樣的需要?”

“啊,你別問我!我不懂你的語言。”

他佇立在小徑上,低頭望著她。“如果我和你沒有共同語言,那我來這兒干什么?”

“哦,我的朋友……!”她把手輕輕地放在他的手臂上。

“埃倫,你為什么不告訴我發(fā)生了什么事?”

“我會告訴你的,但是在哪里告訴你呢?在那個巨大的房子里,老是有用人進(jìn)出各個房間,想獨(dú)自呆上一會兒都辦不到!美國家宅中就沒有讓人獨(dú)處的地方嗎?你們都那么靦腆,同時又那么開放。”

“啊,你不喜歡我們!”紐蘭難過地說。

就在這時,他們走過帕特龍府的一間古老的石屋。斯庫特克利夫首任主人在三百年前建造了這間石屋,并在此居住。范德盧頓夫婦現(xiàn)在保留了這間石屋,并將它作為一處歷史名勝展示給客人們看。

“太幸運(yùn)了!”埃倫喊道,“我們可以進(jìn)去,安靜地談一談。里面還有人生起了爐火。在那里沒人會打擾我們。”

他們走了進(jìn)去,在明亮的爐火旁坐下。

“你寫信給我的時候很不愉快。”紐蘭凝視著她表情豐富的臉說。

“是啊。可你在這兒,我就不會覺得不愉快了。”

“我在這兒呆不了多久。”為了不讓自己說得太多,他雙唇有些僵硬了。

“我知道。不過,我只圖一時快樂,我不會把事情看得太長遠(yuǎn)。”

他漸漸感受到了這些話的誘惑。他站起身望向窗外,背對著她。假如她一直逃避的原來是他,而她是想等他們在這隱秘之處單獨(dú)相處時再告訴他,那該怎么辦?

“埃倫,請告訴我。告訴我你在逃避誰。”

她沉默了很長一段時間,期間紐蘭幻想她會悄悄走到他身后,張開輕盈的雙臂摟住他的脖子。他幾乎聽見她的動靜。他等待著,整個身心都準(zhǔn)備好迎接這美妙的事情,可就在這時,他看見一個穿著厚重外套的男人,正沿著小路朝宅子走過來——那人正是朱利葉斯·博福特。

“啊!”紐蘭猛地笑起來,說:“原來是這么回事?”

奧蘭斯卡夫人跑到他身旁,悄悄把手伸進(jìn)他手里??僧?dāng)她看見博福特時,臉色變得煞白。“我并不知道他在這兒,”她小聲說,依然握著紐蘭的手,但他把手抽了回去,然后走到門廳,猛地打開小屋的門。“快進(jìn)來,博福特,走這邊!奧蘭斯卡夫人正等著你呢!”他說。

第二天紐蘭啟程回紐約,途中他想起博福特時心生怨恨。博福特顯然就是埃倫想逃避的那個人。他在追求她,而朱利葉斯·博福特追求漂亮女人從來只有一個目的。

接下來的兩三天,時間過得非常緩慢。有時,紐蘭感覺自己正被前途活埋。他沒有聽到埃倫的任何消息,直至第四天傍晚,才在家里收到她的一封便函。上面簡短地寫著:

明天傍晚過來,我一定要向你解釋。

埃倫

年輕人整晚都在想那封便函。答復(fù)的方式有好幾種。直至黎明時分,他終于決定了回答的方式,就是收拾幾件衣服放入旅行箱,然后跳上一班當(dāng)天駛往佛羅里達(dá)的輪船。

紐蘭沿著圣奧古斯丁的沙面大路往前走,當(dāng)他看見梅·韋蘭站在那里,頭發(fā)上灑滿了陽光時,懷疑自己為何等了這么久才來。這里才是真實(shí)世界,這里才有屬于他的生活!

“紐蘭——發(fā)生什么事了嗎?”她問。

“是的,我覺得我必須見見你。”他回答說。她的臉上一下子現(xiàn)出幸福的紅暈。他們坐在橘樹下的一張長凳上。他伸出胳膊摟住她的腰并親吻她。這感覺就像在炎熱的夏日里喝上清涼的山泉。

他對梅的父母解釋說,他過來是因?yàn)樗杏X自己可能要感冒。對于健康的一切憂慮,韋蘭先生感同身受,因此他堅(jiān)持要紐蘭留下和他們待上至少一個星期,以防止他得病。

在佛羅里達(dá)溫暖的日光下,他和梅一起散步、讀書、劃船。他無時無刻不在想著他們的婚禮,但它似乎是難以想象地遙不可及。

他離開前的一天,他們又來到橘樹林中散步。他突然脫口而出:“梅,難道你不明白嗎?我希望讓我們的夢想變成現(xiàn)實(shí)!我希望你成為我的妻子,不用等到以后,現(xiàn)在就嫁給我!我想今年就結(jié)婚,不要等到明年!”

梅沉默了片刻。然后,她用清澈的眼睛直視著他,說道:“我不敢肯定自己是否真的明白。這是否——是否因?yàn)槟銢]有把握會繼續(xù)喜歡我呢?”

紐蘭震驚,他說:“我的天——也許吧——我不知道。”兩人一時間都沉默不語。

“如果那是真的——那么,我們之間是否有第三個人?我們坦率地談?wù)劙?,紐蘭。自從我們訂婚的消息宣布之后,我感覺你變了。”

“親愛的,你在胡說些什么?”他擠出這句話。

“我們談?wù)撘幌乱矡o妨。犯錯極其容易——任何人都會。”

“假如我犯了你說的那種錯誤,我會求你快點(diǎn)兒嫁給我嗎?”

她默想片刻,終于說道:“會,你也許想——一勞永逸地解決這個問題。”

她的鎮(zhèn)定和睿智讓他大吃一驚,但他可以看出這對她來說是多么痛苦。她接著說:“你知道,一位姑娘能看通的,比她父母所想象的要多。我早就知道你過去的生活中曾有一個人。我見過她一次——那時她臉色很悲傷,我為她感到難過——后來我們訂婚時我還記得。”

“親愛的——你說的就是那件事?。磕阋侵勒嫦嗑秃昧?!”

“這么說,還有我不知道的真相?”

“我的意思是說,那段往事的真相。”

“可我就是想知道那件事的真相。紐蘭,我不能把自己的幸福建立在對另一個女人的不公平之上!我明白,當(dāng)兩個人真心相愛,他們也許不得不違背公眾輿論。如果你覺得自己……對那個女人有任何許諾……又假如有什么辦法讓你能夠履行自己的承諾……甚至通過讓她離婚的方法,那么,紐蘭,不要因?yàn)槲叶鴴仐壦?rdquo;

他從未像此時此刻那樣對梅充滿欽佩之情。她如此坦率地講話,這是多么有勇氣??!而且,她居然提出放棄他以成全他以前的情人,這是多么慷慨大度啊!可是,即便她聰慧至此,卻依然沒有看出他此刻因何事而煩惱。

“根本沒有你想的那種承諾,但我很喜歡你這么說。我是說,每個女人都有權(quán)得到自由——”他停下來,為自己想到的事情吃了一驚。

梅轉(zhuǎn)過頭來望著他,臉色泛紅。他低下頭去吻她,發(fā)現(xiàn)她雙眼噙滿了幸福的淚水。有那么一會兒,紐蘭看到了一個能夠獨(dú)立思考、準(zhǔn)備掙脫社會約束的女人。但下一刻眼前人又變回從前那個行規(guī)矩步的梅,這讓他感到失望。她似乎覺察到他的失望,但卻不知道該對此做些什么。兩人默默無語地走回家去。

紐蘭返回紐約兩天后拜訪了曼森·明戈特老太太,想游說她運(yùn)用對韋蘭夫婦的影響力,把他和梅的婚禮日期提前。她被他的急切逗樂了,所以同意幫忙。前去看望奶奶的伯爵夫人正好也在場,她聽著這番談話,神情若有所思。之后,她陪紐蘭走到前門,他們單獨(dú)待了幾分鐘。

“我什么時候可以去見你?”他小聲問。

“什么時間都行。不過,如果你想再看看那所小房子,就一定要快。下個星期我就要搬家了。”

那一瞬間,他仿佛又回到她客廳里,身處于異域風(fēng)情的氣氛中。“明晚怎么樣?”他問。

“明天,好吧,不過要早些,晚點(diǎn)我要外出。”

他到她家的時候才八點(diǎn)半。在客廳里,他見到了埃倫的姑媽梅多拉·曼森。她去了長途旅行,剛自古巴回來。她和他打了招呼。在他們等著埃倫時,她說自己帶了一封伯爵的信,要交給她的侄女。“是啊,我那可憐的傻瓜奧蘭斯基,”她又說,“他只要她回去,繼續(xù)當(dāng)他的妻子!”

“我的天!”紐蘭喊道,并跳了起來。

“你嚇壞了?當(dāng)然我不會替他辯解。可是,如果她繼續(xù)留在這里,想想她要放棄些什么!宮殿、珠寶、藝術(shù)、價值連城的家具、音樂和聰敏的談話——請?jiān)彛H愛的年輕人,那些東西這里一樣都沒有。阿徹先生,事實(shí)上我聽說你對親愛的埃倫很有影響力,因此我希望能得到你的支持——讓你確信……”

“確信她應(yīng)該回去?那我寧愿看她去死!”年輕人激動地喊。

“啊。”曼森太太平靜地說,“你是要我相信,你寧愿讓她去死嗎?”她指指沙發(fā)上一大束昂貴的花,當(dāng)眼處放著博福特的名片。“婚姻畢竟是婚姻……我侄女現(xiàn)在仍然是別人的妻子……”

正說著,埃倫出現(xiàn)在門口。

“我們正在說,親愛的,”曼森太太笑著說,“這是有個仰慕者給你送來的東西。”

奧蘭斯卡夫人轉(zhuǎn)過身,看見了那束花,一股無聲的憤怒仿佛在她體內(nèi)流竄。她拉鈴叫來用人,讓她把花送給隔壁生病的鄰居。“立刻把花送走!”她大聲說,“我不要在家里看見這東西!”她轉(zhuǎn)身對紐蘭說:“阿徹先生,我姑媽剛剛要走,請你把她送上馬車,好嗎?等馬車回來的時候我再走。”

他回來的時候,伯爵夫人正坐在爐火旁。

“你姑媽認(rèn)為你會回到你丈夫的身邊。”他說。

“人們相信我會接受很多殘忍的事情。”

“哦,埃倫——請?jiān)?mdash;—我是個傻瓜!”

“我知道你有自己的煩惱。你覺得韋蘭夫婦對你的婚事不通情理,我當(dāng)然贊同你的意見。”他意識到她在轉(zhuǎn)換話題。

“是的。我去了南方,要求梅縮短訂婚期。我們倆坦率地談了一次,事實(shí)上這是我們頭一回如此坦率地談。她認(rèn)為我的急不可耐是一種不好的征兆。她覺得,我想立刻同她結(jié)婚,是為了逃避某人——一個我更喜歡的人。”

“可如果她是那樣想的話,干嗎不也急著結(jié)婚呢?”

“因?yàn)樗皇悄欠N人,她要高尚得多。她提出要為另外那個女人而放棄我。”

奧蘭斯卡夫人凝視了爐火好一會兒。紐蘭聽見下面安靜的街道上,傳來她的馬返回的聲音。

“那確實(shí)很高尚。”她說。

“是的。不過,我并不打算娶別人。”

“噢。”她又靜默了好一會兒,“這另外那個女人——她愛你嗎?”

“啊,根本就沒有另外一個女人。我是說,梅所想象的那個人從來都沒——”

“那你究竟為何這樣急著結(jié)婚呢?”

“你的馬車來了。”紐蘭說。

“是啊,我得走了。我約好了去斯特拉瑟斯太太家。我必須接受別人的邀約,不然我會太孤單。”她略微笑了笑。

紐蘭不想讓她離開。“梅猜對了,”他說,“確實(shí)有另外一個女人——但不是她想的那一位。”

她沒有答話,也沒有動。他坐到她身邊,抓住她的手。可她卻跳起來把手掙脫。

“可別向我求愛!太多男人這樣做了!”

這是她能夠跟他說的最尖刻的話了。

“我從來沒向你求過愛,今后也不會。但是,假如有可能的話,你才是我想要娶的女人。”

“可正是你讓這變得不可能!”她喊道。

他睜大眼睛看著她,在一片昏暗的思緒中,有一點(diǎn)炫目的光。

“是我讓這一切變得不可能?”

“是你,是你,是你!”她的嘴唇在顫抖,“是你讓我放棄離婚的想法,好讓我的家族避開輿論和丑聞。因?yàn)槟銓蔀槲壹易宓囊粏T,所以我按照你說的做了。我這樣做是為了你,為了梅!”

“我的天!”他叫道,“我當(dāng)時想的是……噢,別問我想的是什么!”

她臉漲得通紅:“可我確實(shí)問了你。”

“你丈夫的信里有些指責(zé)……”

“那封信里沒有什么讓我害怕的內(nèi)容,絕對沒有!我擔(dān)心的就只有給家族,給你和梅,帶來丑聞。”

“我的天!”他又一次叫道,并用雙手捂住了臉。

隨后的沉默像墓碑石一樣壓在他們身上,而對紐蘭來說,似再沒有任何東西能夠卸去他心頭的重負(fù)。他沒有動,頭也沒有從雙手上抬起。

“至少我愛過你!”他的話語劃破了那片黑暗。

他聽見房間的另一頭有一聲孩子般的抽噎。他跑到她身邊。

“埃倫!你瘋了么?你哭什么?沒有覆水難收這回事。我還是自由身,你不久也是。”他用胳膊摟住她,他唇下那張臉就像被打濕的花朵。為什么,噢,為什么他竟然站了五分鐘時間,在屋子另一頭與她爭論?原來只要一碰觸她就能使一切變得如此簡單。

她回應(yīng)他的吻。但過了一會兒,他覺得她在他懷中變得繃緊,接著她把他推到一邊。

“啊,我可憐的紐蘭——我想這一切注定會發(fā)生,但這絲毫改變不了現(xiàn)實(shí)。”

“它改變我的整個生活。”

“不,那不應(yīng)該,也不可能。你已經(jīng)和梅·韋蘭訂了婚,而我還維持著和伯爵的婚姻關(guān)系。”

紐蘭站了起來,他說:“瞎說!說這種話已經(jīng)太晚了。我們沒有權(quán)利欺騙他人、欺騙自己。”

“你講這樣的話,是因?yàn)檠巯逻@樣說最容易。事實(shí)上,除了我們兩個已經(jīng)作出的決定,要做其他事已經(jīng)太晚了。聽我說,從一開始我就知道你是多么善良、多么高尚。大好人不能打動我——我覺得他們從未被誘惑過。但是你明白,你理解。你體驗(yàn)過外面的世界用金手誘惑你的滋味——然而,你不接受用冷酷換取的幸福。這比我所知的一切都更好、更高尚。”

她止住淚水,靜靜地說著,每個字都烙在了紐倫的心頭。“我們還是不要改變你已經(jīng)做了的事吧!”她大聲說,“我現(xiàn)在不能回頭去那樣想了。只有放棄你,我才能愛你。”

他們依舊面對著面,但已然被她這番話制造的距離分隔開了。他突然覺得很生氣。“那么是博福特?他會取代我的位置?你今晚要去見他,對嗎?”

“我今天晚上不出去了。”她平靜地說。

“你告訴我你很孤單——我沒有權(quán)利讓你離開你的朋友們。”他憤憤地說。

“現(xiàn)在我不孤單了。我曾經(jīng)孤單過,也曾經(jīng)恐懼過,但現(xiàn)在空虛與黑暗的感覺已然消散。”

他背過臉去,有一種精疲力竭的感覺。

就在此刻,門鈴響了。一分鐘之后,用人走進(jìn)來,手里拿著一封給伯爵夫人的電報。上面寫著:

外婆電報奏效。爸媽同意復(fù)活節(jié)后結(jié)婚。幸福難言。愛你。你感恩的梅。

半個小時之后,紐蘭打開自己家的前門,他在門廳里見到了一封內(nèi)容相近的電報在等著他,上面寫著:

爸媽同意復(fù)活節(jié)后的周二在格雷斯教堂舉行婚禮。很高興。愛你的梅。

他不能自已地狂笑起來。他妹妹聽見笑聲,從臥室里走了出來。

“紐蘭,究竟怎么啦?已經(jīng)很晚了!”

“沒什么,珍妮,再過一個月我就要結(jié)婚了!”

珍妮緊緊摟著他的脖子,把他按到自己瘦弱的胸前。“哦,紐蘭,太好了!我真高興!可是,你為什么笑個不停?別笑了,不然會吵醒媽媽的。”

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