一封感謝信帶來的幸福感

親愛的讀者，

We want to let you know that we are grateful that you are taking the time to click on this headline. Because without you reading the story, what’s the point?

我們想讓你知道，我們非常感激你能花時(shí)間點(diǎn)開這篇文章的標(biāo)題。因?yàn)槿绻麤]有你的閱讀，又有什么意義呢?

We are now going to use your precious time to share a surprising new finding: People like getting thank you notes.

我們現(xiàn)在將占用你寶貴的時(shí)間來分享一個(gè)意想不到的新發(fā)現(xiàn)：人們喜歡收到表達(dá)感謝的便條。

O.K., it’s not that surprising. But what did surprise two psychologists as they attempted to get to bottom of why so few people actually send thank yous is that many people totally “miscalibrate” the effect of an appreciative email. They underestimate the positive feelings it will bring.

好吧，這不是那么令人意外。但是當(dāng)兩位心理學(xué)家想要弄清楚為什么事實(shí)上很少有人會(huì)寄感謝信時(shí)，讓他們感到驚訝的是，很多人完全錯(cuò)誤地估計(jì)了一封感謝郵件的效果。他們低估了它所能帶來的積極感受。

“They think it’s not going to be that big a deal,” said Amit Kumar, a professor at the University of Texas at Austin who studies well-being.

“他們覺得這不是個(gè)大事兒，”阿米特·庫(kù)馬爾(Amit Kumar)說。他是德克薩斯大學(xué)奧斯汀分校一位研究幸福感的教授。

They also overestimate how insincere the note may appear and how uncomfortable it will make the recipient feel, their study found.

他們的研究發(fā)現(xiàn)，人們還高估了便條所可能呈顯出的不真誠(chéng)，以及它可能給收信人帶來的不適感。

But after receiving thank-you notes and filling out questionnaires about how it felt to get them, many said they were “ecstatic,” scoring the happiness rating at 4 of 5. The senders typically guessed they’d evoke a 3.

但是在收到表達(dá)感謝的便條，并填寫了有關(guān)收信感受的調(diào)查問卷后，很多人說他們“欣喜若狂”，并將幸福指數(shù)打?yàn)?分(滿分5分)。寄信人通常猜測(cè)他們會(huì)打3分。

To be clear — the notes in question were not your typical “thanks for the Amazon gift card.” Rather, the 100 or so participants in each of the four experiments were asked to write a short “gratitude letter” to a person who had affected them in some way. Sample letters included missives of appreciation to fellow students and friends who offered guidance through the college admissions process, job searches and tough times. In lab experiments, Dr. Kumar observed that it took most subjects less than five minutes to write the letters.

需要明確的是，這里涉及的并非通常那種“謝謝你的亞馬遜禮品卡”之類的便條。被分配到四組實(shí)驗(yàn)中的每組約100名參與者，實(shí)際上被要求寫一封簡(jiǎn)短的“感恩信”，給曾經(jīng)以某種方式影響過他們的人。樣本信中有向在大學(xué)錄取、求職以及人生的艱難時(shí)光里給過自己指導(dǎo)的同窗及好友的感謝信。在室內(nèi)試驗(yàn)中，庫(kù)馬爾發(fā)現(xiàn)大多數(shù)受試者用來寫這些感謝信的時(shí)間不到五分鐘。

The study, published last month in the journal Psychological Science, is an effort to fill a hole in the growing field of gratitude research. Numerous studies had documented a range of benefits to individuals who express gratitude, so then the question researchers turned to was — what’s holding people back?

這項(xiàng)研究上個(gè)月發(fā)表在《心理科學(xué)》期刊上，旨在彌補(bǔ)感恩研究這一新興研究領(lǐng)域的空白。大量研究已經(jīng)證明表達(dá)感激對(duì)個(gè)體的各種好處，那么研究者們致力的問題就是——是什么在阻止人們表達(dá)感激?

Along with underestimating the value of sending a note to another person, many seemed to be concerned with how much their writing would be scrutinized.

除了低估給別人寄便條的價(jià)值，很多人似乎還很在意他們的寫作會(huì)受到怎樣的審視。

As it turned out, most recipients didn’t care how the notes were phrased, they cared about warmth, Dr. Kumar and his co-author Nicholas Epley, a professor at the University of Chicago, found. Participants were also judged to be more competent at writing than they expected.

結(jié)果表明，大多數(shù)收信人并不在意便條上的內(nèi)容是如何措辭的，庫(kù)馬爾和他的合著者、芝加哥大學(xué)教授尼古拉斯·艾普利(Nicholas Epley)發(fā)現(xiàn)，他們?cè)谝獾氖菧厍椤Ｊ茉囌叩膶懽魉降玫降脑u(píng)判，也好于他們的預(yù)期。

This finding was “a gem” that is “worthy of future research” said Sara Algoe, a professor at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, who also researches gratitude, in an email.

這項(xiàng)發(fā)現(xiàn)是一個(gè)值得后續(xù)研究的“珍寶”，北卡羅萊納大學(xué)教堂山分校的教授莎拉·阿爾戈(Sara Algoe)在一封郵件中寫道，她研究的也是感恩。

“I like that their work reinforces the value of just saying something,” she wrote.

“說出來總是有價(jià)值的，他們的研究支持了這個(gè)觀點(diǎn)，這是我喜歡的地方，”她寫道。

Researchers also encouraged the writers of the thank-you messages to mention that a study had spurred their letters, something that doesn’t usually happen in real life. How often do we get to tell someone, “a scientist asked me to do this” before making ourselves vulnerable? The study found that many subjects were concerned that recipients would feel awkward upon receiving the compliment-filled letters. (Recipients rarely did.) Wouldn’t those concerns intensify without a good excuse for sending it?

研究者們還鼓勵(lì)這些感謝信的作者們?cè)谛胖刑峒?，是一?xiàng)研究激勵(lì)了他們寫下這些信，這是現(xiàn)實(shí)生活中通常不會(huì)發(fā)生的事。我們什么時(shí)候會(huì)在袒露自己之前，跟人說是“一個(gè)科學(xué)家讓我這樣做的”呢?研究表明，很多受試者很在意收信人會(huì)在收到充滿贊揚(yáng)的信時(shí)感到尷尬。(收信人很少這樣。)那些擔(dān)心是否會(huì)在缺乏一個(gè)恰當(dāng)?shù)募男爬碛蓵r(shí)加劇?

Perhaps, said Dr. Kumar. But that should not undermine what he sees as the broader finding: People tend to undervalue the positive effect they can have on others for a tiny investment of time.

也許吧，庫(kù)馬爾說。但那不應(yīng)該削弱他認(rèn)為更具有廣泛意義的一個(gè)發(fā)現(xiàn)：人們往往低估了自己花費(fèi)少量的一點(diǎn)時(shí)間所能給別人帶來的積極影響。

Most people don’t read this far so thanks for that,

大多數(shù)人都沒讀到這兒，因此，感謝你讀完，

The New York Times Health and Science Desk

《紐約時(shí)報(bào)》健康與科學(xué)編輯部