學(xué)累了嗎?那就讓我們開(kāi)心一下吧!
1. Send in the clowns
請(qǐng)小丑來(lái)
One Apail 1st a memo from Maintenance appeared on a faculty bulletin board at the University of Minnesota:"This week we will thoroughly clean the new telephone lines by injecting compressed air into the cables. To control dust and debris that may emanate from your receivers, faculty members are urged to store their phones in their wastebaskets or to procure special.bags from the departmental secretary.Thank you for your cooperation.”
4月1日那天,在明尼索達(dá)大學(xué)的取工布告欄上貼著一張從后勤部發(fā)來(lái)的備忘錄:“這周我們準(zhǔn)備往電纜線里注升壓縮空氣,以便物底清掃電話線。為了避免灰塵和碎片殘骸從你的電話聽(tīng)筒里冒出來(lái),特告誡員工們把電話放在回廢紙簍里,或從系秘書處領(lǐng)取特珠的口袋。謝謝你的合作!” Three full professors requested the bags. 三位教授去領(lǐng)取了口袋。
2. .Luck
幸運(yùn)?
Walking to work one day, my husband was hit by a car. It was a minor accident and the driver apologized,adding; "You certainly are lucky. We're right next to a doctor's office."
有一天我丈夫走路去上班,被汽車給撞了。我丈夫傷勢(shì)不太重。司機(jī)向他道了歉,隨后又說(shuō):“你太幸運(yùn)了,我們就在醫(yī)務(wù)室附近。”
"I don't know how lucky that is ,"my husband replied."I' m the doctor. "
我丈夫回答說(shuō):“我并不感到有多幸運(yùn),我就是那兒的醫(yī)生。”
3. Doctor's promise
大夫的許諾
A guy spots his doctor in the shopping center. He stops and says. "Two months ago when I was in your office, you told me to go home,get into bed and stay there until you called. But you never called. "I didn't?"the doctor says."Then what are you doing out of bed?"
一個(gè)人在購(gòu)物中心看見(jiàn)了給他看病的大夫,他叫住了大夫說(shuō):“兩個(gè)月前,我到你辦會(huì)室去看病,你讓我回來(lái)躺在床上,等你的電話。但你從來(lái)就沒(méi)打過(guò)電話.” 大夫說(shuō):“我沒(méi)打過(guò)電話嗎?那你下床干什么呢?”
4. Share
分享
As the mother of three small children born two years apart, I'm often very tired in the evening. Their father and I have set strict rules that after stories,prayers, one drink and the bathroom scene,they must go to bed and stay there.
作為一個(gè)每隔兩年生一個(gè)小孩,現(xiàn)已是三個(gè)小孩的母親,我到晚止時(shí)常感列精疲力盡。他們的父親和我給孩子們訂下嚴(yán)格的規(guī)定:講完故事、祈禱、喝水、上廁所之后,他們必須馬上上床睡覺(jué)。不許再干別的事。
One night,after a particularly trying day,all three were finally tucked in and I headed to the kitchen for some cookies,milk and solitude. I had just started to relax when I was surrounded by three little people,standing there watching me eat. Turning to their father I asked,"Do we relent or stick with the rules?"
一天晚上,經(jīng)過(guò)了一番努力,三個(gè)孩子終于鉆進(jìn)了被窩。我來(lái)到了廚房想吃點(diǎn)餅干,喝點(diǎn)牛奶,獨(dú)自呆一會(huì)兒。我剛想放松一下,就被二個(gè)孩子團(tuán)團(tuán)圍住。他們站在那兒盯著我吃東西.我轉(zhuǎn)向他們的父親問(wèn):“我們還要不要遵守規(guī)定了?”
Our three-year-old piped up,”Stick with the rules,Mom. "
我們?nèi)龤q的小孩說(shuō):“媽媽,還是堅(jiān)持按規(guī)定做吧!”
Knowing she didn't really want to be sent back to bed,I asked,"And what are the rules,Mellisa?"
我知道她不想去睡覺(jué),就問(wèn):“瑪麗莎,那么規(guī)定是怎么說(shuō)的呢?”
"Share with one another,"she replied. “有福同享。”她回答說(shuō)。
5. Miss forgetful
健忘小姐
My friend Pam has a problem remembering numbers.After moving. she gave out her new phone listing. One.acquairitance tried to call hey but reached a travel agency. The agent said she'd received a lot of calls for Pam. The caller apologized and said she'd try to reach Pam at her office. 我的朋友潘,特別不善于記數(shù)字。她搬走后,把她的新電話號(hào)碼給了大家。一個(gè)熟人議圖給她打電話,結(jié)果卻打到了旅游局.那里的代理商說(shuō),他已替潘接了很多電話。打電話的人道了歉,并說(shuō)她再往潘的辦公室打電話我她。
"If you do get hold of her,”the agent replied,"will you tell her that her order is in at Sears?" “如果你能找到她的話,”代理商回答說(shuō):“你能告訴她嗎?她在希爾斯商店訂的貨已經(jīng)到了。”
可以把故事說(shuō)給你的朋友們聽(tīng)哦!