Later!” The word, the voice, the attitude.
I’d never heard anyone use “later” to say goodbye before. It sounded harsh, curt, and dismissive, spoken with the veiled indifference of people who may not care to see or hear from you again.
It is the first thing I remember about him, and I can hear it still today. Later!
I shut my eyes, say the word, and I’m back in Italy, so many years ago, walking down the tree-lined driveway, watching him step out of the cab, billowy blue shirt, wide-open collar, sunglasses, straw hat, skin everywhere. Suddenly he’s shaking my hand, handing me his backpack, removing his suitcase from the trunk of the cab, asking if my father is home.
It might have started right there and then: the shirt, the rolled-up sleeves, the rounded balls of his heels slipping in and out of his frayed espadrilles, eager to test the hot gravel path that led to our house, every stride already asking, Which way to the beach?
This summer’s houseguest. Another bore.
 
“回頭再說(shuō)！”那字眼、那聲音、那態(tài)度。
我從未聽(tīng)過(guò)任何人用“回頭再說(shuō)”這句話來(lái)道別。聽(tīng)起來(lái)刺耳、簡(jiǎn)慢輕蔑，語(yǔ)氣中有著隱藏的冷淡，感覺(jué)說(shuō)話的人似乎不情愿再見(jiàn)到你或收到你的音信。
這是我關(guān)于他的第一個(gè)記憶，至今依稀可聞?；仡^再說(shuō)！
閉上眼睛，說(shuō)出這句話，我仿佛一下子又回到多年前的意大利：我沿著林蔭車道走，看著他走下出租車，身上是件寬松的藍(lán)襯衫，領(lǐng)口大敞，戴著太陽(yáng)眼鏡、草帽，露出大片肌膚；下一刻，他就跟我握手，把背包遞給我，從出租車后備廂里拿出手提箱，寒暄著問(wèn)我父親是否在家。
一切或許始于那個(gè)地方、那個(gè)瞬間：那件襯衫、卷起的衣袖、渾圓的腳后跟在磨損的布面平底涼鞋里滑進(jìn)滑出的樣子、急著試探通往我們家的那條礫石道熱騰騰的溫度，邁開(kāi)的每一步伐仿佛都在問(wèn)著：“哪條路通往海邊？”
今年夏天的來(lái)客，又一個(gè)討厭鬼。
 
Then, almost without thinking, and with his back already turned to the car, he waves the back of his free hand and utters a careless Later! to another passenger in the car who has probably split the fare from the station. No name added, no jest to smooth out the ruffled leave-taking, nothing. His one-word send-off: brisk, bold, and blunted—take your pick, he couldn’t be bothered which.
You watch, I thought, this is how he’ll say goodbye to us when the time comes. With a gruff, slapdash Later!
Meanwhile, we’d have to put up with him for six long weeks.
I was thoroughly intimidated. The unapproachable sort.
I could grow to like him, though. From rounded chin to rounded heel. Then, within days, I would learn to hate him.
This, the very person whose photo on the application form months earlier had leapt out with promises of instant affinities.
 
接著，背對(duì)出租車的他幾乎不假思索地?fù)]揮空著的那只手，朝車上另一位或許是從車站一起拼車過(guò)來(lái)的乘客吐出一句漫不經(jīng)心的“回頭再說(shuō)”。沒(méi)加上名字，沒(méi)有一句俏皮話來(lái)緩和告別時(shí)那種不甚愉悅的氣氛，什么都沒(méi)有。他那簡(jiǎn)短的道別顯得快活、唐突、干脆——隨你怎么說(shuō)，他才不在乎。
看著吧，到時(shí)候他也會(huì)這樣跟我們道別。用一個(gè)粗魯又馬虎的“回頭再說(shuō)”！
同時(shí)，我們得忍受他漫長(zhǎng)的六個(gè)星期。
我有點(diǎn)害怕。他肯定是那種難以相處的人。
不過(guò)，我也可能會(huì)慢慢喜歡他。從他圓圓的下巴到圓圓的腳跟。接著，幾天之內(nèi)，我會(huì)開(kāi)始恨他。
正是他，幾個(gè)月前照片還貼在申請(qǐng)表的人，帶著讓人不由得喜歡的親和力，活脫脫出現(xiàn)我眼前。
 

《請(qǐng)以你的名字呼喚我》