優(yōu)衣庫找費(fèi)德勒拍了新廣告

Poor Roger Federer. The man widely regarded as theworld’s greatest tennis player in history is only sevenmonths into his deal with clothing giants Uniqlo andthey have already made him look an absolute plum.

可憐的羅杰·費(fèi)德勒，這個在全球被廣泛視為史上最偉大網(wǎng)球運(yùn)動員的男子，他和服裝巨頭優(yōu)衣庫的合同才簽了7個月，而后者已經(jīng)讓他看起來像個徹底的傻瓜了。

The Swiss player is no stranger to toe-curlingadvertising campaigns, of course.

當(dāng)然，這位瑞士運(yùn)動員拍廣告蹩腳已經(jīng)不是一天兩天了。

But his latest foray into salesmanship raises theface-palm bar way, way higher than a garment which combines technologically advancedfabric and large, easy-to-close buttons. Way higher.

但他最新的這次向銷售員的轉(zhuǎn)型真的讓人捂臉，其強(qiáng)烈程度遠(yuǎn)高于一個把高科技先進(jìn)面料與易于操作的巨大紐扣相結(jié)合的服裝品牌。真的高多了。

This 30-second masterpiece-cum-car-crash opens with the great man standing at a piano in awell-appointed house. Federer is clad in jeans of an Eighties hue and a khaki green shirt.

在這段30秒的教科書級別車禍現(xiàn)場一樣的廣告的開頭，這位人生贏家站在井然有序的家中的鋼琴前。費(fèi)德勒穿著一條有80年代影子的牛仔褲，還有一件卡其綠的襯衫。

 

 

It then cuts to a close-up of his face, caked in production make-up. “I could only think of tennisand nothing else when I first started,” he says, before playing the opening bars to “Prelude No 1 to Well Tempered Clavier” by Johann Sebastian Bach. Really. The 20-time Grand Slam winnercan play Bach.

然后鏡頭切換到了他的臉部特寫，上面蓋滿了拍攝需要的化妝品。他說：“當(dāng)我剛?cè)胄械臅r候，我腦子里只有網(wǎng)球。”然后他開始在鋼琴上彈奏約翰·塞巴斯蒂安·巴赫的《十二平均律第一序曲》。對，真的，這位得過20次大滿貫的球員能彈巴赫。

“Once I began taking time for myself,” he continued over the music, “that’s when I truly startedwinning. My time off the court is just as important as my time on. Because tennis is just thebeginning of my story. I am just getting started.”

彈完之后，他繼續(xù)說：“但直到我終于開始自由支配時間，我才真的體會到什么是贏。我在場外的時間就和在場上的時間一樣重要。因為，網(wǎng)球只是我故事的開端，而我的故事才剛剛開始。”

Which on first listening is all great – until you remember that a career in the resolutelyindividual activity that is tennis could be seen as the epitome of “taking time for myself”.

這一切乍聽之下似乎都不錯，但你很快意識到他的這個名為網(wǎng)球的事業(yè)似乎本身就代表著“自由支配時間”。

And then comes the clincher. The music stops. “My life, my jeans,” Federer adds, surelyweeping inside. “Authentic jeans with all day comfort.”

之后的橋段就更讓人咬牙切齒了。音樂一停，費(fèi)德勒開始說：“我的生活，我的牛仔褲，全真的牛仔褲帶來全天的舒適。”他說這話的時候心里肯定在哭。

It is just that he doesn’t actually seem to be acting. He is trying to sound earnest. To think thatFederer has over nine years remaining on his deal. What will they make him do next?

更要命的是，他似乎并不是在演戲，他是在努力讓自己聽起來更真誠。想想看，他和這家公司的合同還有9年啊，他們之后會讓他再做些啥呢?