銀行
Banks will loan you money if you can prove you don't need it.
銀行會貸款給你,如果你能證明你并不需要這筆錢。
Bank accounts give a person a good feeling until theyrealize that banks are insured by an agency of afederal government that's over $2 trillion in debt.
有銀行賬戶會讓人感覺良好,可等他們知道銀行因為欠債1萬億而被聯(lián)邦政府部門上了保險之后呢。
Banks have a very interesting philosophy. You give them your money to keep--and if you try toborrow it back, they want to know if you're good for it!
銀行有一套有趣的哲學(xué)。你把你的錢放在他們那里保管,當(dāng)你想借回時,他們卻要你證明自己的資信!
I just went partners with my bank. They own half my car.
我剛和我的銀行合股,他們擁有我的車的一半產(chǎn)權(quán)。
Even my bank doesn't have confidence in me. I have three things printed on my checks: myname, address and insufficient funds.
我的銀行都不信任我。我的支票上印了三樣?xùn)|西:我的姓名、我的地址和短缺資金。
Banks are very much concerned with the best interest of your own. And they get it!
銀行非常在乎本城最好的利率,他們確實拿到了!
A bank is a dignified institution that was established for people to have a place to keep thegovernment's money until tax time.
銀行是個莊嚴(yán)的機構(gòu),它的設(shè)立是為了讓人們能有地方在交稅日前保存政府的錢。
The first drive-in bank was established so that people could show their cars who really ownedthem.
第一家汽車(駛?cè)?銀行建立了,這樣人們就能把他們的車展示給真正擁有它們的人了。
Why are there bank robbers? Bank ads make it seem like it's easier to just walk in and get aloan.
為什么會有人搶劫銀行?銀行的廣告使他們覺得這樣走進去就得到一筆貸款更容易些。
I must have a dishonest face. The bank asks me for ID when I deposit money.
我一定長著一張不誠實的臉,不然為什么我去銀行存錢時,他們還管我要身份證。
If bankers can count, how come they always have ten windows and two tellers?
如果開銀行的會數(shù)數(shù),他們怎么能有10個窗口卻總是只坐著兩個出納。
A guy walked into a bank and said, "I want to open a joint account with somebody who hasmoney."
一個人走進銀行說:“我想和一個有錢的人開一個聯(lián)合賬戶。”
Last week I got a $5000 home improvement loan from my bank. I'm sending the kids tocollege.
上星期我得到了5000美元的房貸,我要用這錢送孩子們上大學(xué)。
One bank opened a branch near a cemetery. In the window the president put a sign that read, "You can't take it with you when you go, but here's a chance to be near it."
一家銀行在公墓邊開了個分行。他們的總裁在銀行窗戶上掛了一塊廣告牌,上面寫著:“你不能帶著它走,但放在我們這里會讓你離它近些。”
I tried to open an account in the bank yesterday, but they turned me down.
昨天我想在銀行開個賬戶,可他們拒絕了我。
Why?
為什么?
I wanted to open a charge account!
我想開個賒欠戶。