時差N小時:你屬于哪種約會對象?

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唐：那么，雅艾爾，你的相親怎么樣了?

Yael: Not so well. He was one of those "anxiousattachment" types.

雅艾爾：不太好。他是那種“焦慮依附”類型的人。

Don: "Anxious attachment" types? I don't think Iknow about those.

唐：“焦慮依附”類型?我想我不知道這些。

Yael: Sure. That's one of the three majorpsychological patterns that have been identifiedin adult romantic relationships—at least accordingto research done at Harvard Medical School and the University of California.

雅艾爾：當然。根據(jù)哈佛大學醫(yī)學院和加利福尼亞大學所做的研究，那是成人戀愛中的三種主要心理模式之一，。

Don: What are the other two types?

唐：其他兩種類型是什么?

Yael: Well, there are "secure attachment" people. This kind of person tends to show a lot oftrust and be willing to compromise. The majority of people fall into this category. "Avoidant attachment" people are afraid of emotional intimacy and often say a lot of badthings about it. "Anxious attachment" people are insecure about relationships in general andtend to try and control other people.

雅艾爾：嗯，還有一種類型是“安全依附”型。這種人易相信別人，而且愿意妥協(xié)。大部分人都屬于這種類型。而“逃避依附”型的人則害怕與人感情過于親密，還經(jīng)常對此進行抱怨。“焦慮依附”型的人對兩人的關系缺乏安全感，傾向于去控制他人。

Don: Sounds like "secure attachment" is the one to look for.

唐：聽起來“安全依附”型的人是我要找的對象。

Yael: Interestingly, in a study of over eight thousand people between the ages of fifteen andfifty-four, more "anxious attachment" was found in young people than older people.Researchers have two theories about this. It may be that our younger generation is just moreanxious than they used to be—maybe because of other things going on in their lives. Substanceabuse, divorce and money worries all seem to steer young people into the "anxiousattachment" camp. Or it might be that a lot of people are anxious about love when they areyoung, and then as they get older they tend to find a stable relationship and take on more ofthe characteristics of the "secure attachment" folks.

雅艾爾：有趣的是，一項研究調(diào)查了八千多名年齡在15至54歲之間的人，研究發(fā)現(xiàn)年輕人中屬于“焦慮依附”型的人比年老人更多。研究人員對此有兩種看法。其一可能是我們年輕一代比以前更容易感到焦慮，或許是因為他們在生活中遇到坎坷。濫用藥物、離婚、經(jīng)濟困難使年輕人落入焦慮型的陣營。其二或許是許多年輕人對愛情感到焦慮，隨著年齡的增長他們往往會找到一份穩(wěn)定的感情，因此就呈現(xiàn)出更多“安全依附”型的特點。

Don: That's a hopeful possibility!

唐：那是相當有可能的。