Silver lining time? 來說個好消息吧
We didn't have to change Douglas and his mother's diapers? 我們很幸運,不用幫道格拉斯和他媽媽換尿布嗎
We made $240 for the cupcake business selling all that crap on eBay. 那堆垃圾在易趣上賣了二百四十塊,開店基金又多了不少
Yup. I made some money, and all I lost was my mind. 不錯,錢是掙到了,但心卻傷了
Want to hear something you don't want to hear? 想聽一些你不想聽的話嗎
I think what Johnny said to you was beautiful. 我覺得強尼說的話很動人
You think a squirrel holding an acorn is beautiful. 你覺得松鼠拿著松子也很動人呢
He didn't touch you or kiss you 他沒有碰你或親你
because he didn't want to start a relationship with you out of a lie. 是因為他不想讓你們的感情建立在謊言上
You know what? You're right. 你說得對
You've been right all along. 你一直都是對的
It is like Romeo and Juliet. 我們的確像羅密歐與茱麗葉
And now I'm gonna go home and kill myself. 我現(xiàn)在該是我回家自殺的時刻了
I don't think romance is in the cards for me. 我覺得浪漫愛情故事沒我的份
I give guys blue balls, not broken hearts. 男人只會上我到蛋疼,從不會心疼
Oh, my god. Don't kill yourself yet, Juliet. 我的老天,茱麗葉,先別死
I definitely think romance is in your cards. 我覺得你就是浪漫愛情故事的主角
That's not me. 那不是我
That's not his girlfriend. 那也不是他的女朋友
Come on, will you at least admit that that's you 拜托,你至少承認那是你吧
and that he put it up there because he wanted you to see it? 他畫在那里就是想讓你看見
And that's actually incredibly romantic. 真是浪漫到不行啊
Oh, yeah. That's the most romantic picture of a guy who might be kissing someone 是啊,這副浪漫的畫像是一個男的可能在親
who might look like me, 一個可能像我的人
but he didn't because he has a hot British girlfriend who seems like kind of a bitch, 但實際他沒有,因為他有一個英國辣女友,雖然看起來像個潑婦
but is kind of cooler than I will ever be. 但是確實擁有我不可企及的酷
I dare you to organize that thought. 你把這個想法整理給我看看啊
There's no one cooler than you. 沒人比你更酷
You're 200 feet tall. 你有二百英尺高呢
Yeah, and a bird just took a crap on me. 是啊,有只鳥剛把屎拉我身上了
Come on. 走吧
Come on. 走呀