“So, Mr.Husain, how does it feel to be a winner?”
記者:“Husain先生,當一個贏家是什么感覺?”
He said in his soft, resonant voice, “I am an artist.”
他用低沉和藹的聲音回答道:“我是一個藝術(shù)家。”
“Yes.How does it feel to be winning prizes?”
記者:“嗯,我知道,那得獎是什么感覺?”
He said, more firmly, “Every day I come to this studio and what I do is, I use my imagination, I make draft sketches, and then I paint.Every day, I make art.You understand? Winning is not what I spend my days doing.”
他的語氣更加堅定,他說:“每天我來到工作室所做的事情就是發(fā)揮想象力,畫草圖,上色。每天我都在制造藝術(shù)品。你懂么?我每天費盡心力并不是為了贏。”
It's been more than 20 years, but I've often thought of that exchange, which I'd recorded in my notes.Winning and losing: we do so much of each in our lives, and most of us have, if we're honest, a complicated, intensely personal relationship with competitiveness.Modern culture places a premium on learning how to do either gracefully.You're supposed to lose with a smile, a shrug, to make a handsome bow in the direction of the one who won the shining trophy instead of you.You're supposed also to be a good winner, expansive in your moment of triumph towards those who didn't make the cut, to display humility, gratitude, generosity.
這件事已經(jīng)過去20多年了,但是我還是會時常想起那次對話,我把這些內(nèi)容記到了筆記中。贏和輸:我們在生活之中不斷經(jīng)歷輸贏,坦白說,我們中大多數(shù)人與競爭力都有著千絲萬縷的、密切的私交?,F(xiàn)代文化使得人們更加注重學習“無論輸贏都優(yōu)雅應(yīng)對”的能力。哪怕輸了,你也應(yīng)該保持微笑,或者聳聳肩,或者向著那個贏的人的方向瀟灑鞠上一躬,畢竟他贏得了熠熠生輝的獎杯,而不是你。如果你贏了,你也應(yīng)該做一個好的贏家,向沒有晉級的人張開胸懷,展現(xiàn)出你是個虛懷若谷、心懷感恩、慷慨大方的人。
When the US president rage-tweets his anger at losing the popular vote in the recent elections, declaring that “I won the popular vote if you deduct the millions of people who voted illegally”, he is not merely breaking a norm of social politeness by being a bad loser.He demonstrates that even the most powerful can succumb to an overdeveloped sense of entitlement, an inability to accept a loss and move on.
美國總統(tǒng)由于在最近的大選中輸了直接選票,就怒發(fā)推特來宣泄他的憤怒,他說:“如果去掉那些非法投票的人的選票,那我就贏了。”這樣做使他成了一個徹底的輸家,不僅僅是破壞社會禮貌規(guī)范那么簡單了。從他身上我們可以看出,哪怕是最有權(quán)力的人也會屈服于一發(fā)不可收拾的特權(quán)感,難以接受失去,然后繼續(xù)前行。
Wanting to win is different from wanting to be successful—to win, you must have opponents to beat, which is what I find slightly uncomfortable about the business of prizes and shortlists.Success is more internal; it has a private side to it.
渴望成為贏家與渴望成功有所不同。如果要贏,你必須打敗對手,這也是我認為商業(yè)獎項和提名的些許不妥之處。而成功則主要在于內(nèi)心,有更加私人的一面。
In 2008, JK Rowling made a commencement address to Harvard students.She said that, at their age, her greatest fear was not of poverty, but of failure.She experienced both—seven years after her graduation, she had a failed marriage, was jobless, a single parent, very poor.But she decided to speak about the benefits of failure, because “failure meant a stripping away of the inessential”.It freed her to find out what really mattered to her, when all she had was the daughter she loved, some friends, and “an old typewriter and a big idea”.
2008年,J·K·羅琳給哈佛大學學生做了一次畢業(yè)演講。她說,當她在大家這個年齡時,她最怕的不是貧窮,而是失敗。畢業(yè)7年以后,這兩種苦她都嘗了個遍。她婚姻失敗,丟了工作,是個單身母親,還生活窘迫。但是她想談的是失敗的益處,因為“失敗將那些非本質(zhì)的東西都剝離了”。因此她可以找到對她真正重要的東西,因為她所擁有的全部僅有一個深愛的女兒、一些朋友、一臺舊的打字機和腦袋里的宏偉藍圖。
Why do people love this story? Because of the determination Rowling expresses, and her fierce discipline, but chiefly because she succeeded beyond anyone's wildest dreams.Without the success of the Harry Potter series, the failures she describes would be dismally ordinary, the everyday circumstance of someone with talent never writing her books, or never getting published, or being published and falling unremarked upon through the cracks.
為什么人們喜歡這個故事?可能是因為羅琳表達出的決心,或她所經(jīng)歷的磨煉,但是最主要的還是她成功了,甚至實現(xiàn)了人們異想天開的夢想。如果哈利·波特系列沒有成功,她所描述的失敗也就不足掛齒,那就是一個普通的故事,一個有才華的人從未寫書,或所寫的書從未出版,或出版之后無人問津。
I believed that I had developed an immunity of sorts to the deep vulnerability that accompanies competitiveness, after being on the other side, evaluating applications for residencies and books for literary prizes.The first time I was asked to be on a prize jury, I swung between extremes of pleasure—so many voluptuous hours of reading!—and anxiety, completely terrified that I might miss a quiet gem, make the wrong decisions, not do sufficient justice to some writer's talent.
我認為,在審批居住申請、評估獲獎圖書之后,我已經(jīng)擁有了免疫力,對抗伴隨競爭力而來的深深的脆弱。我第一次被邀請出任評獎委員會委員時,我既興奮——可以數(shù)小時享受閱讀的快樂——又充滿焦慮,非常害怕我可能會錯過一塊璞玉,做出錯誤的決定,使得一些作家明珠暗投。
From that time of reading other writers' work and being on juries, I learnt something that helped me get over my own fear of losing.After some years you recognise that, beyond prizes, there is an almost endless stream of ideas, and possibilities, and rewards.Some are visible, some are more subtle, but this stream is available to artists, writers and anyone willing to discipline themselves to the routines of practice and creation.
通過閱讀其他作者的作品,擔任評委,我學到了能夠幫助我戰(zhàn)勝怕輸心態(tài)的辦法。許多年后你會意識到,永不干涸的靈感之泉,無限的可能性和回報,比獎項重要得多。有些是有形的,有些則需要仔細觀察才能發(fā)現(xiàn),但是藝術(shù)家、作家,或是任何想要通過練習和創(chuàng)造磨煉自己的人,都能擁有這涓涓細流。
I had come to this happy realisation, won a few prizes, lost out on some, and retained my equilibrium through both sets of experiences, when I met a writer who was a legend to his readers in his local language but, at that time, almost unknown to Indians who read only in English.
我已經(jīng)產(chǎn)生了以上令人欣喜的頓悟,贏了一些獎,也輸了一些。輸過贏過之后,我的心態(tài)已經(jīng)較為平衡,這時,我遇到了一個作家,在說當?shù)卣Z言的讀者們心中,他是傳奇人物,但是在只說英語的印度人中卻默默無聞。
He had won a major prize for authors in translation.He dealt with the media with the grace and humility you hope that writers you admire will demonstrate, and I thought that here was a lesson in not taking prizes too seriously.
他贏得了一個譯作界的大獎。他在面對媒體時,十分得體謙遜,展現(xiàn)出了你對所喜愛作家期待的一切品質(zhì)。我認為這個人就是能看淡獎項的典范。
We were sharing a taxi to the awards ceremony.The writer got in, checked quickly to see that no one else was watching—and then bounced on the seat like an excitable three-year-old.“I won!” he said.“I'm so happy that I won the prize!” Then he confided to me, as though it was a most precious secret: “You see, I like winning.”
我們?nèi)ヮC獎典禮坐的是同一輛車。這個作家上車之后,迅速環(huán)顧四周看看確保沒人在看他后,興奮地跳上座位,仿佛一個三歲孩子。他說:“我贏啦。能得到這個獎我真開心!”接下來,他對我坦白說:“你看,我喜歡做贏家”,仿佛是在告訴我一個最珍貴的秘密。