聽美劇學英語_生活大爆炸第三季 第9集 (下)
Come on, Katee. Don't make it sound so cheap.
別這樣嘛，凱蒂何必說得這么低俗呢
I'm sorry, fiddling with yourself in the bathtub is a real class act.
抱歉，在浴缸里自欺欺人確實是出類拔萃的行為
Thank you.
謝謝
So, shall we get started?
我們可以開始了嗎
Sure.
當然
But can I ask you a question first?
但我能先問你個問題嗎
Do you want to play Cylon and colonist?
你想扮演賽昂人和殖民者嗎
No.
不
I want to know why you're playing make-believe with me when you could be out with a real woman tonight.
我很奇怪，你明明可以和真人約會卻在這里和我玩性幻想游戲
You mean, Bernadette?
你是指伯納黛特嗎
No, I mean Princess Leia.
路克·天行者的雙胞胎妹妹) 不，我是指萊婭公主(星戰(zhàn)人物
Of course I mean Bernadette. She's a wonderful girl and she really likes you.
我當然指的是伯納黛特她是個很好的女孩兒，真的喜歡你
I know, but she's not you.
我知道，但她不是你
I'm not me.
我又不是真實的
The real me is in Beverly Hills going out with a tall, handsome, rich guy.
真正的我現正在比弗利山莊和某個英俊高大的有錢人約會呢
Really? Tall?
真的嗎，很高大嗎
- Six-four. - Ouch.
-一米九三呢，-哇哦
The point is, you've got a wonderful girl in your life, And you're ignoring her in order to spend your nights in the bathtub with a mental image and a wash cloth.
問題在于，你遇到了一個好女孩但卻寧愿整晚在浴缸里對著虛擬影像和浴巾性幻想，也不去理她
Howard!
霍華德
What are you doing in there?
你到底在里面干嘛
I'm taking a bath!
我在洗澡
I hope that's all you're doing!
你可別做啥其他猥瑣的事
We share that tub!
那浴缸我也要用
Don't remind me!
別提醒我
Oh, man.
老天
All soaped up and no place to go.
都是泡泡，沒有我子孫的容身之地了
How ya doin', buddy?
哥們兒，你還好吧
I was humiliated on national radio. How do you think I'm doing?
我在國家電臺上被當眾羞辱能好受才怪
Come on, it wasn't that bad.
拜托，沒這么夸張吧
What do you want?
你們來干嘛
We represent the Lollipop Guild, and we want you.
(綠野仙蹤中的麥琪肯人歡迎多蘿西)我們是棒棒糖團隊，歡迎你的到來
Okay, so Kripke played a joke on you.
好啊，克瑞普克捉弄了你一下
It wasn't funny.
不好笑
- I thought it was funny. - Raj.
-我覺得很好笑，-拉杰
You laughed.
你也笑了啊
Did you laugh?
你笑了嗎
I fell on the floor.
我笑得滾到地板上了
All right, he got you.
好吧，這次是他贏了
You can get him back.
你可以以牙還牙嘛
I refuse to sink to his level.
我才不要墮落到他那種水準
You can't sink. With all that helium in you, you're lucky you don't float away.
你落不了，體內充滿了氦氣遇水不飄走就算你走運啦
Are you really admitting defeat?
你當真認栽了嗎
I never admit defeat.
我從不認栽
Good.
很好
However, on an unrelated topic, I am never getting out of this bed again.
但是，從另一個方面講我再也抬不起頭做人了
What if you could make Kripke look even sillier than he made you look?
那何不這樣，你設法捉弄克瑞普克讓他看起來比你更蠢
I don't think that's possible, dude.
我覺得這不可能，老兄
You're not helping.
你盡說些喪氣話
I didn't come to help, I came to mock.
我本就不是來說好話，我是來吐糟的
Sheldon, what you need to do is figure out a way to exact vengeance on Kripke, like, uh,
謝爾頓，你現在得好好想想到底怎么報復克瑞普克
like, how the Joker got back at Batman for putting him in the Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane.
好比蝙蝠俠把瘋子罪犯小丑扔進了亞克汗瘋人院，事后他不是越獄了嗎
That's true. He didn't just stay there and talk about his feelings with the other psychotic villains.
是啊，他不光是待在里面對其他精神病惡棍大吐苦水
He, he broke out and poisoned Gotham's water supply.
還越獄了，還對哥譚市的供水系統(tǒng)投毒
Well...
好吧
- I suppose I could poison Kripke. - No!
那我該給克瑞普克下毒，-不
No. It's a simple matter. There are several toxic chemicals that'd be untraceable in an autopsy.
不，這其實很簡單有那么幾種有毒化學物尸檢是查不出來的
Okay, uh, that's the spirit,
你抓到了要領
but, um, let's dial it back to a non-lethal form of vengeance.
但手段可以溫柔點不要置人于死地
How about we whoopee cushion on his office chair?
這樣，在他的辦公室椅子上弄個放屁墊
He'll sit down, it'll sound like he's flatulent, even though he's not.
他一坐下，聽起來就像是有胃氣脹盡管他不是真有胃氣脹
Let's keep thinking.
還是再想想吧
Oh, gee, you're too late.
老兄，你可來晚了
Scarlett Johansson and Wonder Woman were just in here trolling around for neurotic, little weasels.
斯嘉麗·喬納森和神奇女俠剛在這里輪番歌頌神經質和膽小鬼呢
I came to talk to Bernadette. She's working today, right?
我來找伯納黛特，她今天上班嗎
Yes, but I don't think she wants to see you.
是啊，但我覺得她不想見你
Why not?
為啥
Come on, Howard. You hurt her feelings by not calling her all week.
得了，霍華德，你傷害了她一個星期都不給人家電話
Plus, I've kind of been talkin' some smack about ya.
加上我還說了你不少壞話
Hello, Howard.
好啊，霍華德
Wait, Bernadette, I need to talk to you.
等下，伯納黛特，我有話對你說
I can't now, I'm working. This will only take a second.
現在不成，我在工作呢。就一會兒
You asked me to think about where our relationship was going, and I did.
你之前讓我好好考慮我們之間的關系，好吧我想過了
Bernadette?
伯納黛特
Will you marry me?
你愿意嫁給我嗎
Is this more comedy that I don't understand?
我不明白，這算是玩笑嗎
No. I'm serious.
不，我是認真的
I'm never going to find another girl like you who likes me and is, you know, real.
你是我生命中的唯一重要的是，你是真心喜歡我
So, this isn't a joke?
這不是開玩笑嗎
- No. - Then you're insane.
-不是，-那你鐵定瘋了
I prefer to think of myself as quirky.
我覺得自己這是突施奇招
Howard, we've only been on three dates.
霍華德，我們只約會了三次
We haven't even had sex yet.
甚至還沒上過床
Fair enough.
你說得對
When's your break?
你什么時候下班
Don't you just hate when this happens?
好事將成，你們嫉妒我了不是
All right, how's this for revenge?
好了，用這個來復仇如何
A solution of hydrogen peroxide, and one of saturated potassium iodide.
一劑過氧化氫(雙氧水) 加上一劑飽和碘化鉀
What's this?
這又是什么
Mountain Dew.
山露汽水(碳酸飲料)
Ahh, refreshing.
啊，真是提神醒腦
We're going to combine these chemicals with ordinary dish soap, creating a little exothermic release of oxygen.
然后將這兩樣化學制劑，與普通洗碗劑結合就會放熱，釋放出氧
Foamy vengeance. Yes, exactly.
泡沫復仇記。完全正確
This is brilliant, Sheldon. How are we going to deploy it in Kripke's office? Already taken care of.
謝爾頓，這招實在是高但你怎么布置到克瑞普克的辦公室。早就布置好了
Observe.
注意看
This is a live shot of Kripke's lab via a mini webcam I was able to install, thanks to a dollar bill discreetly placed in the night janitor's shirt pocket.
通過迷你攝像頭拍攝到的克瑞普克實驗室實況拜我偷塞到看門人襯衫口袋里的美鈔所賜我才能裝了這個迷你攝像頭
At the same time, I also secured large quantities of these chemicals above the tiles in the drop ceiling.
與此同時還將大量這樣的化學制劑放到了他的天花板頂上
Oh, Sheldon,
哦，謝爾頓
you remind me of a young Lex Luthor.
你讓我想起年輕時的萊克斯·盧瑟(后成為超人的死敵)
You flatter me, sir.
您太過獎了，先生
- Let me guess: motion sensors? - Yes.
-我猜猜，帶運動感應器的，-是的
The reaction will be triggered when Kripke reaches the center of the room.
一旦克瑞普克走到屋子中間感應器就會觸發(fā)
Mwah, ha, ha.
木哈哈
I gotta say, I am really impressed.
我不得不承認，我很佩服你
This is truly the Sheldon Cooper way to get even.
這絕對是謝爾頓式的復仇方式
It may be low-tech,
這招或許技術含量不高
but I still maintain the whoopee cushion has comic validity.
但我還是堅持認為，放屁坐墊自有其喜劇效應
Here comes Kripke!
克瑞普克來了
Who is that with him?
跟他一起的是誰
I believe that's the president of the university. And the board of directors.Abort! Abort!
我想那是我們大學的校長還有理事會成員，快中止，中止
There is no "abort." How could you not put in an "abort?"
沒有中止程序，你怎么能不設中止程序
I made a boo-boo, all right?
我疏忽了，好了吧
I think the board will really appreciate how well we're using that NSA grant, President Seibert.
塞伯特校長，相信理事會將很欣慰地看到我們將國安局的撥款運用得如此之好
Right here we have a micro-controlled plasma...
這里是我們的微電腦控制的等離子...
Wow. Looks like the Ganges on laundry day.
看上去就像洗衣日那天的恒河
At least they don't know it was you.
至少他們不知道是你干的
Hello, Kripke.
你好，克瑞普克
This classic prank comes to you from the malevolent mind of Sheldon Cooper.
你此刻遭遇的經典惡作劇來自惡意復仇的謝爾頓·庫珀
If you'd like to see the look on your stupid face,
如果你想看看自己那張蠢蛋臉
YouTube this video is being instantly uploaded to YouTube.
這段視頻即刻就會上傳到
Oh, and a hat tip to Leonard Hofstadter and Raj Koothrappali
并感謝萊納德·霍夫斯塔德和拉杰·庫薩帕里
for their support and encouragement in this enterprise.
感謝他們在復仇大業(yè)中對我的支持與鼓勵
Well, I'm going back to India.What's your plan?
我計劃逃回印度去，你呢
Hey, here's your tip from table seven.
給，7號桌給的小費
Oh, thanks.
謝謝
Testing. Check.Check two.
麥克風測試，再次測試
Oh, now what?
這回又怎么了
You want me to throw him out?
想讓我扔他出去嗎
No, that's okay.
不用，沒事的
Are you sure? He's small.
你確定，他個子那么小
I bet I can get a nice, tight spiral on him.
我打賭我肯定能給他來個漂亮的背摔
I want to dedicate this number to a great gal who I've done wrong.
這一曲，我想獻給一位被我傷害了的好姑娘
Bernadette
伯納黛特(曲調來自The Four Tops樂隊的《Bernadette》)
I am so sorry for
我感到非常抱歉
Trying to propose to you
因我向你求婚之事
Bernadette
伯納黛特
You found it creepy
你覺得我行事瘋狂
But that's just the kind of thing I do
但那就是我的風格
I know now it was too soon to talk of love
我知道現在說愛還太早
It was just a crazy idea that came to me in my tub
那只是我泡澡時突發(fā)的奇想
But, Bernadette, give me one more chance Sweet Bernadette
但伯納黛特，請再給我一次機會親愛的伯納黛特
I'll get the hang of this thing They call romance, Sweet Bernadette
我保證很快找到竅門找到浪漫的竅門，親愛的伯納黛特
I dream to once again
我夢想著能夠再一次
Kiss your lips, Sweet Bernadette
吻上你的雙唇，親愛的伯納黛特
Sincerely yours Howard Wolowitz Bernadette...
您的裙下之臣霍華德·沃羅威茨 伯納黛特
- Oh, I am so sorry. - Are you kidding?
-實在聽不下去了，-你開什么玩笑
That's the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me.
那是別人為我所做的，最浪漫的事
Bernadette!，Thank you, Cheesecake Factory!
伯納黛特，謝謝芝士蛋糕工廠
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