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Amy, I don't understand, are we broken up or not? It's like you can't make up your mind.
艾米,我不明白,我們到底分手了沒?你好像一直作不了決定啊
It's because you're not giving me any space to think.
那是因?yàn)槟阃耆唤o我思考的空間
Well, you should think fast, because men can sire offspring their entire lives,but those eggs you're toting around have a sellby date.
是嗎,那你最好趕緊想,因?yàn)槟腥艘惠呑佣寄軅髯诮哟?,你的卵子可是?huì)過期作廢哦
You know what, Sheldon, you've made this really easy.You're immature, you're selfish, you just insulted me to my face.
謝爾頓,你這臨門一腳來得正是時(shí)候。你是個(gè)幼稚透頂,自私自利的人,你還當(dāng)面羞辱我
I don't need any more time to think. We're broken up.Amy...
我不用再想了,咱倆玩完了。艾米
Will someone take me home?
有誰能送我回家嗎
Yeah. Come on, I'll give you a ride.
好吧,我送你回去
...symbolizes your eternal love. I now pronounce you husband and wife.
...象征你們永恒的愛,我現(xiàn)在宣布你們正式結(jié)為夫妻
We did it!I'm so glad you guys could watch!
我們結(jié)婚啦。真開心你們能見證這一刻
We'll say it was beautiful in the comment section.
我們就在留言區(qū)留"太美太感人"好了
No, no, no. Hang on.I believe I'm supposed to carry you across the threshold.
不,不,等一下,照習(xí)俗我應(yīng)該抱你入洞房
Can you? Who do you think carries Sheldon to bed when he falls asleep in front of the TV?
你行嗎?你以為謝爾頓看電視睡著都是哪位壯士抱他回房間的啊
Okay, let's do it.You gonna make it? I'm okay!
好吧,來吧。你能做到嗎,沒問題
Nicely done! Thank you. Finally, there's a Mrs. Hofstadter who isn't disappointed in me.
順利完成。謝謝你??偹阌幸晃?quot;霍夫斯塔德夫人"沒對我失望了
Well, the night is still young.
說這話還為時(shí)尚早呢
Everything all right? Yeah. I guess.
你沒事吧,沒事
Just tell me. It's just, when we were kissing, I couldn't help but picture you with that other girl.
告訴我嘛。我們接吻時(shí),我總是忍不住去想你和其他女孩的畫面
Oh, no. No, come on. I have a friend in you. You said so.
不會(huì)吧,別這樣,你可是我的好朋友,你自己說的
You're right. Just forget it.Yeah.
你說得對,忘掉這事吧,好的
Okay, listen. Uh...If you're imagining that it was sexy, it wasn't.
好了,聽我說,如果你以為那是很香艷的畫面,其實(shí)并沒有
We-we were both drunk, and she smelled like an ashtray. The boat was moving a lot, so I chipped her tooth.
我們都喝掛了,她一股子煙灰缸味,船身搖晃不定,我還撞碎了她的牙齒
Did you feel guilty? No, she had dental insurance.
你覺得內(nèi)疚嗎?不,她有牙醫(yī)保險(xiǎn)
Did you feel guilty after kissing her?
你和她接吻后覺得內(nèi)疚嗎
Yes. I felt guilty as soon as it happened. I feel guilty every time I see her.
當(dāng)然,我剛親完就后悔了,每次看到她都有深深的負(fù)罪感
What do you mean, every time you see her?
你說每次看到她是什么意思
What... do I mean? Boy, that's a toughie.
我...是什么意思呢,老天,這個(gè)問題可真難
You still see her? Well, no, not socially.But, you know, just at work.
你現(xiàn)在還會(huì)見她嗎?不,不是約她見面的那種,只是工作時(shí)會(huì)遇到
You work with her?!How could you not tell me that?!
你還和她一起工作嗎?你怎么不告訴我這件事
I wanted to tell you in the car, but you told me to stop talking!
我在車?yán)锞拖敫嬖V你,可你要我閉嘴
Oh, okay. So you're saying this is my fault?
好呀,所以現(xiàn)在是我錯(cuò)了嗎
No, of course not.Okay, look, instead of fighting, why don't we dim the lights, um, get naked and make a baby?
不,當(dāng)然不是。好了,我說,我們不要吵了,不如把燈關(guān)掉,脫光光,造寶寶好不好
I was trying to lighten the mood.It's not easy. You try it.
我是在努力調(diào)節(jié)氣氛,這事可不容易,不信你試試
Hello, Mother. Shelly! How's my baby doing?
媽媽,你好。謝利,寶貝你還好嗎
I just wanted to let you know that you can remove Amy from your nightly prayers.Unless you're open to praying for a beehive to fall on her head.
我想讓你知道你可以把艾米從你的夜禱名單上去掉了,除非你愿意祈禱一個(gè)大蜂巢掉在她頭上
Oh, what's going on? She broke up with me.
這是怎么了?她和我分手了
Oh, Shelly. No, I'll be okay.But I think that I'd like to send the ring back to you.
謝利。不,我沒事,但我想把戒指寄還給你
Well, let's not be hasty.Are you sure it's over for good?
先別這么著急,你確定真的結(jié)束了嗎
It's over for me. I'm done with women.Like when I swore off Pop Rocks.They both hurt you on purpose.
反正我是結(jié)束了,我受夠女人了,就像我再也不吃跳跳糖一樣,他們都故意傷害我
You want to tell me what happened?Are you going to say it's all part of God's plan?
想跟媽媽傾訴一下嗎?你會(huì)說一切都是上帝安排好的嗎
Good chance.Then no, thank you.
很有可能。謝謝,那還是算了
Well, honey, don't send it back yet. Your sister's married, and I'm not letting your brother give my grandmother's ring to that whore he's dating.
寶貝,先別把戒指寄回來。你姐姐結(jié)婚了,我祖母的戒指我不想送給你哥哥在泡的那個(gè)小蕩婦
Wasn't Mary Magdalene a woman of ill repute?
抹大拉的瑪利亞不也是個(gè)妓女嗎
When your idiot brother redeems mankind, he can date whoever he wants.
如果你那白癡哥哥可以拯救人間蒼生,那他想和誰約會(huì)都沒問題。
I know it hurts now, but it's gonna get better.
我知道你現(xiàn)在很難過,但會(huì)過去的
Yeah.Everything's gonna be okay.You've got so much to offer.
是的。一切都會(huì)好起來,你集無數(shù)優(yōu)點(diǎn)于一身
Thank you. Any man would be lucky to have you.
謝謝你,能和你在一起是每個(gè)男人的榮幸
That's true.I just hope I did the right thing.
沒錯(cuò),我只希望我做了正確的選擇
I'm sure you did.Maybe that's the problem you always do the right thing. Maybe it's time to do the wrong thing.
我肯定你做得對,或許這就是你的問題,永遠(yuǎn)做正確的選擇,或許是時(shí)候"犯個(gè)錯(cuò)誤"了
Like you're doing right now? Exactly.
比如做你現(xiàn)在這樣的錯(cuò)事嗎? 沒錯(cuò)
I asked you over and over if you were okay. Why would you go through with the wedding if you weren't?
我一次又一次問你介不介意,如果你介意,為什么還要完婚呢
I thought I was okay, but it turns out I'm not.
我本來以為我不介意,誰知道原來不行。
Okay, listen, I may not have been entirely faithful,but you, you are not easy to lift!
好吧,我或許不是百分百誠實(shí),但你體重也不是多輕好嗎
Well, marriage must agree with you.Well, you are just glowing.
婚姻太適合你了,你整個(gè)人容光煥發(fā)啊
I'm not glowing.I'm upset.
我才沒有容光煥發(fā),我是不爽到炸
Well, whatever it is, it agrees with you.
隨便你什么心情,反正太適合你了
Knock, knock, knock, Penny?Knock, knock, knock, Penny?Knock, knock, knock, Penny?
敲,敲,敲,佩妮。敲,敲,敲,佩妮。敲,敲,敲,佩妮。
What's this?
這是什么
Leonard told me what happened,so I took it upon myself to make you a hot beverage.
萊納德都跟我說了,所以我自發(fā)為你做了熱飲
Oh. That's so sweet of you.
你真是太貼心了
Yeah. I know. Turns out, being sweet isn't enough to keep a girl these days.I blame Madonna.
我知道,事實(shí)證明,這年頭貼心并不能留住姑娘。都怪麥當(dāng)娜
I'm sorry to hear about you and Amy.
很遺憾你和艾米分手了
Well, I'm sorry about Leonard. Thought I raised him better than that.
我也很遺憾萊納德那樣對你,都怪我沒教好他
You know, it's bad enough what happened, but then he tried to hide the fact that he sees her all the time at the university.
發(fā)生那種事已經(jīng)夠糟心了。但更糟心的是他還試圖隱瞞他整天能在大學(xué)里見到她
He does? Who is it? Some girl named Mandy.
是嗎,誰啊?一個(gè)叫曼蒂的女人
Mandy Chao? Yeah.Oh, you don't need to worry about her. She's brilliant and attractive. She can do way better than Leonard.
曼蒂·周嗎,對的。你完全不需要擔(dān)心她,她美貌與智慧兼具,她能找到比萊納德好十萬倍的男人
That's great.Wait a minute.I know this may sound farfetched,but I'm on the market now.
太好了。等等,我知道這話可能有點(diǎn)不現(xiàn)實(shí),但我現(xiàn)在也單身了
You know, if I dated Mandy, that would teach both Leonard and Amy a lesson.
如果我跟曼蒂好上了,應(yīng)該能給萊納德與艾米一個(gè)教訓(xùn)
That's ridiculous. Oh, you're right. I could never be with a woman whose selfesteem was so low she'd be with Leonard.
這也太荒謬了,也是,我決不會(huì)跟一個(gè)自尊心低到能跟萊納德在一起的女人好上
I'm with Leonard.
我就跟萊納德在一起啊
Yeah, I know. Forever. Who would have believed these things would happen to us?
是啊,一輩子呢,誰敢相信我們居然會(huì)碰到這樣的事
Right? I can't believe Amy actually went through with it.
對吧,我也不敢相信艾米居然真決定狠下心
Hang on. You knew that she was going to end it with me? Did you try and stop her?
等等,你之前就知道她會(huì)跟我分手嗎?你有試圖阻止她嗎
I told her to be true to herself and do what makes her happy.
我讓她直面本心做讓自己開心的選擇
Do what makes her happy? She plays the harp and her car is paid for. How much happier can she be?
做讓自己開心的選擇。她有豎琴有車,這還不夠開心嗎
Okay, look, it's not my fault that she thought you were a bad boyfriend.
這不能怪我啊,她是自己覺得你是差勁的男友
I see. I think I'll be going.
我懂了,我先走一步了
Sheldon... No, no, no, no. We are done here.
謝爾頓,多說無益,就此別過
Would you mind opening the door and then angrily slamming it behind me?
不介意幫我開個(gè)門等我出去后,再幫我氣憤地甩門吧
Sure. Thank you. And slam it hard, because I am pretty steamed.
好,多謝,因?yàn)槲一鹈昂脦渍闪?/div>
All right, Leonard, hang in there. Talk to you tomorrow.
好,萊納德,撐著點(diǎn)啊。明天見
What happened? They just got married.
怎么了,他們才剛剛完婚不是嗎
I don't know. It's a mess. They had a huge fight in Vegas.
我也不知道,反正就一團(tuán)亂,他們在賭城吵了一大架
Think they'll break up?
你覺得他們會(huì)分手嗎
I don't know. Sounds pretty bad.Penny's back in her apartment all by herself. Really?
不確定,聽起來挺嚴(yán)重,佩妮自己一個(gè)人在公寓里待著。是咩
Would you like to hear another reason why men are better than women?
還想再聽另一個(gè)為什么男人比女人強(qiáng)的理由嗎
Sure, let's make it an even hundred.You would never kiss me and make me say "I love you" and then break up with me.
行啊,說一百個(gè)也無妨,你永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)親我,讓我說"我愛你",然后再跟我分手
I wouldn't. And you know why?
我的確不會(huì),你知道為什么嗎
'Cause you're a man. The champagne of genders.
因?yàn)槟闶莻€(gè)男人,高檔牛逼的性別
Well, I may be a man,but I think I'm the one that screwed up on this one.
或許我是個(gè)男人,但這一次做錯(cuò)事的好像是我
Yeah, well, and you admit it, like a man.
是啊,但你像個(gè)男人一樣,承認(rèn)了
All you hear women say is,"I'll just have a salad." "Where's my lip gloss?"
你只會(huì)聽到女人說"我想要一份色拉" "我的唇彩跑哪去了"
"I think this element should be called radium." That last one was Madame Curie.
"我覺得這個(gè)元素應(yīng)該叫鐳",最后那句話是居里夫人說的
I figured that out.You know what? She was kind of an honorary man.She had a penis made of science.
我想到了,她其實(shí)應(yīng)該算是榮譽(yù)男人,她有科學(xué)做的雞雞
Can't believe I'm spending my wedding night with you.
真不敢相信我的新婚之夜是跟你過
Really?I never imagined it any other way.
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