我們的內(nèi)心非常強(qiáng)大,在一瞬間就會(huì)提升或毀掉我們的心情。而真正的問(wèn)題在于,如何將內(nèi)心深處那些消極想法通通趕出去。
Many of us have problems with negative thoughts playing on the channel of our minds, but if you’re engaging in it consistently, and you believe it, it could be eroding your sense of self-esteem. Here are a few beliefs that indicate you may need to switch the station:
很多人腦海中都會(huì)不斷浮現(xiàn)消極的想法,更糟糕的是,如果你真的時(shí)不時(shí)地去想,你就會(huì)信以為真,這足以摧毀你的自尊。如果你也會(huì)出現(xiàn)下面這些消極觀(guān)念,那就代表你應(yīng)該做點(diǎn)改變了。
I’m a loser. 我是個(gè)失敗者。
I’m not good enough. 我不夠好。
I don’t deserve…. 我不配......
No one likes me. 沒(méi)人喜歡我。
I suck at relationships. 我不會(huì)處理感情。
I’m a failure. 我太失敗了。
Negative thoughts conjures up bad feelings and hooks you into believing that what those old tapes in your head are playing is actually true. In short, it brings your focus to your failures, and that gets you nowhere.
消極的想法會(huì)帶來(lái)不好的感受,在那腦海中不斷的像老式磁帶一般重復(fù),也會(huì)讓你信以為真。簡(jiǎn)而言之,這會(huì)讓你把注意力全部放在失敗的事情上,會(huì)讓你徹底迷失自己。
What can you do? Here are some suggestions:
你能做些什么呢?下面是一些建議:
1. Live in the moment
活在當(dāng)下
Self-talk is so subtle that we often don’t notice its effect on our mood and belief systems. Key things to notice are “if only or “what if” statements: the former keep you stuck in the past with regret, while the latter keep you fearful of the future. There is nothing you can do about the past, and the future isn’t here yet, so stay in the present moment.
內(nèi)心的聲音太微妙,有時(shí)我們根本不會(huì)注意到他們對(duì)情緒和信念產(chǎn)生的影響。最需要注意的就是“要是......多好” 和“假使......將會(huì)怎樣” 這樣的想法:前者會(huì)讓你陷入對(duì)過(guò)去無(wú)盡的悔恨,后者會(huì)讓你對(duì)未來(lái)充滿(mǎn)恐懼。對(duì)于過(guò)去,你無(wú)能為力,而未來(lái)還未到來(lái),好好活在當(dāng)下吧。
2. Visualize the good things
讓那些美好變得形象生動(dòng)
If we want to change the negative tapes playing in our heads, we have to visualize ourselves positively—that means seeing yourself non-judgmentally. Picture accepting yourself. How would that look? Draw a picture in your mind and expand on it.
如果要換掉腦海中不斷播放的消極磁帶,我們就要看到自己身上積極的一面,也就是說(shuō)不帶評(píng)判的看看自己。在內(nèi)心細(xì)細(xì)描述客觀(guān)接受自己會(huì)是什么的畫(huà)面。細(xì)細(xì)畫(huà)出心中所想,那會(huì)是什么樣?
3. Recognize that actions always follow beliefs
要認(rèn)識(shí)到行為由信念指引
Whatever you believe, you’ll experience more of, and you’ll also find yourself behaving in ways that are congruent with your beliefs. So, start believing the best about yourself: act as if you believe that you’re a valuable and worthy person.
不管你是否相信,你以后的人生會(huì)經(jīng)歷更多,也會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的行為和信念是相輔相成的。所以要開(kāi)始相信自己最好的一面:相信自己是一個(gè)有價(jià)值的人,然后開(kāi)始行動(dòng)吧。
4. Pay attention to triggers
留神那些“導(dǎo)火索”
Triggers are anything that can start the old tapes playing. If a certain person is a trigger for you, set boundaries with them.
導(dǎo)火索可以使任何讓腦海中消極磁帶播放的人。如果某個(gè)人是你的導(dǎo)火索,那么就遠(yuǎn)離他們。
5. Develop positive counterstatements to refute negative self-talk
積極反駁內(nèi)心那些消極的聲音
Instead of always putting yourself down in your head, think of some things you actually like about yourself. What are your strengths, what are you good at? Keep your counterstatements in the here-and-now, instead of saying “I’m not good enough” try saying, “I am capable.
I’m good at ______. I accept myself the way I am.”
與其在腦海中一味的打壓自己,還不如想想你到底喜歡自己什么樣子。你的強(qiáng)項(xiàng)是什么,特長(zhǎng)是什么?與其說(shuō)“我不夠好”,不如現(xiàn)在就開(kāi)始說(shuō)這句正能量的話(huà)語(yǔ):“我有能力,我擅長(zhǎng)....,我喜歡現(xiàn)在的自己。”
Thinking poorly about ourselves gets us nowhere and is extremely self-limiting. Decide today to turn off the negative self-talk channel in your mind and develop your true potential.
妄自菲薄只會(huì)讓自己迷失方向,同時(shí)限制自身發(fā)展。從今天開(kāi)始就關(guān)掉內(nèi)心的消極頻道,挖掘自身的潛力吧。