| 31 |
| Patient: Doctor help me please, every time I drink a cup of coffee I get |
| this intense stinging in my eye. |
| - |
| Doctor: I suggest you remove the |
| spoon before drinking. |
| 32 |
| Men 1845: I just killed a buffalo. |
| Men 1952: I just fixed the |
| roof. |
| Men 2017: I just shaved my legs. |
| 33 |
| I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, |
| talking in an interesting accent. |
| So I said, “Cool accent, are you |
| two ladies from Ireland?” |
| One of them snarled at me, “It’s Wales, |
| dumbo!” |
| So I corrected myself, “Oh, right, so are you two whales |
| from Ireland?” |
| That’s about as far as I remember. |
| 34 |
| I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s 7 years in a row |
| now. |
| 35 |
| The inventor of AutoCorrect is a stupid mass hole. He can fake right |
| off. |
| 36 |
| A naked women robbed a bank. Nobody could remember her face. |
| 37 |
| A police officer stops a car. |
| Officer: “Your driver’s license |
| please.” |
| Driver: “I’m really sorry, I forgot.” |
| Officer: “At |
| home?” |
| Driver: “No, to do it.” |
| 38 |
| Why is women’s soccer so rare? |
| - |
| It’s quite hard to find enough |
| women willing to wear the same outfit. |
| 39 |
| I was making Russian tea. Unfortunately I cannot fish the teabag out of |
| the vodka bottle. |
