13 在路上
That night I found Carlo and to my amazement he told me he' d been in Central City with Dean.
那天晚上我見到了卡羅,使我吃驚的是他告訴我,他和狄恩去了中央城。
"What did you do?"
“你們?nèi)ツ莾焊墒裁?”
"Oh, we ran around the bars and then Dean stole a car and we drove back down the mountain curves ninety miles an hour."
“噢,我們到那兒的酒吧里轉(zhuǎn)了轉(zhuǎn),后來狄恩偷了一輛汽車,我們以每小時90英里的速度從山上歪歪扭扭把它開了下來。”
"I didn’t see you."
“我沒見到你們。”
"We didn't know you were there."
“我們不知道你也在。”
"Well, man, I’m going to San Francisco."
“噢,老兄,我要去舊金山了。”
"Dean has Rita lined up for you tonight."
“狄恩讓莉塔今晚等你。”
"Well, then, I’II put it off." I had no money. I sent my aunt an airmail letter asking her for fifty dollars and said it would be the last money I’d ask, after that she would be getting money back from me, as soon as I got that ship.
“好的,那么我就推遲幾天走。”我一分錢也沒有了。我已發(fā)了一封航空信給姨媽,跟她要50美元,并且告訴她這是我最后一次向她要錢。以后等我在船上找到工作了,就把錢都還給她。
Then I went to meet Rita Bettencourt and took her back to the apartment. I got her in my bedroom after a long talk in the dark of the front room. She was a nice little girl, simple and true, and tremendously frightened of sex. I told her it was beautiful. I wanted to prove this to her. She let me prove it, but I was too impatient and proved nothing. She sighed in the dark. "What do you want out of life?" I asked, and I used to ask that all the time of girls.
然后我去找莉塔·貝特科特,帶她到我的公寓。我們在前面漆黑的房間里聊了很長時間,然后進了臥室。她是一個好姑娘,純真、樸實,對性生活極其恐懼。我告訴她這是件很美的事。我想向她證明這一點,她也允許我向她證明,但我太不耐煩了,以致什么也沒做。她在黑暗中嘆了口氣。“你想從生活中得到什么呢?”我問她,我總是對女孩子提這樣的問題。
"I don't know," she said. "Just wait on tables and try to get along.0 She yawned. I put my hand over her mouth and told her not to yawn. I tried to tell her how excited I was about life and the things we could do together, saying that, and planning to leave Denver in two days. She turned away wearily. We lay on our backs, looking at the ceiling and wondering what God had wrought when He made life so sad. We made vague plans to meet in Frisco.
“我不知道,”她說,“我只想在飯店好好干,別出亂子就行。”她哀嘆著。我用手捂住了她的嘴,告訴她不要嘆息。我想告訴她我的生活是多么激動人心,告訴她我們可以在一起做許多事。我對她說兩天后我就要離開丹佛了。她傷心地轉(zhuǎn)過身去。我們躺在一起,凝望著天花板。為什么上帝要讓人類如此痛苦,對此,我們都感到迷惑不解。我們初步計劃在舊金山再見。
My moments in Denver were coming to an end, I could feel walked her home, on the way back I stretched out on the grass of an old church with a bunch of hobos, and their talk made me want to get back on that road. Every now and then one would get up and hit a passer-by for a dime. They talked of harvests moving north. It was warm and soft. I wanted to go and get Rita again and tell her a lot more things, and really make love to her this time, and calm her fears about men. Boys and girls in America have such a sad time together, sophistication demands that they submit to sex immediately without proper preliminary talk. Not courting talk一real straight talk about souls, for life is holy and every moment is precious. I heard the Denver and Rio Grande locomotive howling off to the mountains. I wanted to pursue my star further.
當我送她回家的時候,我感到自己在丹佛的生活快要結(jié)束了?;貋淼穆飞?,我伸開四肢躺在教堂前的草坪上,這兒還躺著許多流浪漢,他們的談話令我更想上路了。他們隨時都可能爬起來向過路的人要上幾個子兒,他們談論著自己的收獲??諝馐菧厝岫质孢m的。我真想返回去找莉塔,給她講更多的東西,這次要真的與她做愛,安慰她,讓她不再害怕任何男人。美國的男孩和女孩總是這樣傷心地呆在一起,老于世故使他們立即屈服于性欲,在這之前沒有任何溫柔和愛撫,甚至沒有任何交談—那種心靈與心靈的交流。然而生活是神圣的,生命的每一刻都是珍貴的。我聽到丹佛和里奧格蘭河正咆哮著離我而去,我要去追求我遠方的星星了。
作者介紹:
杰克·凱魯亞克(1922-1969 )美國小說家。出生于馬薩諸塞州洛厄爾城的一個信奉天主教的工人家庭。凱魯亞克是美國五十年代中期崛起的“垮掉的一代”的重要代表人物之一,他一生共創(chuàng)作了18部小說,大多帶有自傳性質(zhì)。他的作品有《鄉(xiāng)村與城市》、《地下室居民》、《達摩流浪者》、《薩克斯醫(yī)生》和《麥琪·卡西迪》,凱魯亞克的作品對社會現(xiàn)實有獨到的認識。
《在路上》的主人公薩爾為了追求刺激,與幾個年輕男女沿途搭便車或自己開車,幾次橫越美國大陸,最終到達墨西哥。一路上他們狂喝爛飲,吸大麻,玩女人,高談東方禪宗,走累了就擋道攔車,夜宿村落,從紐約游蕩到舊金山,最后作鳥獸散。