英語幽默教程匯總和更新

The Absent-minded ProfessorAn absent-minded professor was lecturing on anatomy.一位粗心的教授正在上解剖課。"To show you... [查看全文]

The cost of marriageA little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"一個(gè)小男孩問他的... [查看全文]

Secret For a Long Life A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. I couldn't help noticing how happy you look, she says. What's your secret for a long, happy life? I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat f [查看全文]

Late one night at the insane asylum (瘋?cè)嗽海﹐ne inmate shouted, I am Napoleon! Another one said, How do you know? The first inmate said, God told me! Just then, a voice from another room shouted, I did not! 瘋?cè)嗽?一天晚上，在瘋?cè)嗽豪?，一個(gè)病人說：我是拿破侖！另一個(gè)說：你怎么知道？第一個(gè)人說：上帝對我說的！ [查看全文]

THE SCHOOL HEALTH FORMS had been distributed to the students with an error---the word Sex had been spelled with an o. One mother, filling out the form for her son, wrote in the blank next to Sox: Usually brown. 某學(xué)校發(fā)給學(xué)生的健康調(diào)查表里有個(gè)錯(cuò)別字把性別的性字寫成了襪字。一位母親在為她的兒子填寫表 [查看全文]

The poor husband You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife, the man complained to his friend. She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong. 可憐的丈夫 你根本無法想 [查看全文]

Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example? John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short. 老師：我們都知道熱脹冷縮的道理?，F(xiàn)在，誰給我舉個(gè)例子？ 約翰：嗯，在夏天天都長，在冬天天都短。 [查看全文]

Teacher: If I cut a beefsteak in half and then cut the half in half, what do I get? Tommy: Quarters. Teacher: And then if I cut it twice again? Tommy: Hamburger. 我能得到什么？ 老師：如果我把一塊牛排切成兩半的兩半，我能得到幾塊兒？ 湯米：四塊。 老師：那我要是再切兩次，我能得到什么呢？ 湯米：漢堡。 [查看全文]

Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director's office. 一個(gè)年輕人在被雇用幾個(gè)星期后，被叫到人事經(jīng)理的辦公室。 What is the meaning of this? the director asked. When you applied for the job, you told us you had five years' experience. Now [查看全文]

Each Sunday the minister called the children to the front of the church while he told them a story. Once he brought a telephone to better illustrate the idea of prayer. 每個(gè)星期天牧師都會(huì)把孩子們叫到教堂前面，然后給他們講一個(gè)故事。一天，他為了更好地闡述祈禱的含義，帶來了一臺(tái)電話機(jī)。 You talk to people on the te [查看全文]