名師講解散文《秋天的色彩》的翻譯

名師講解散文《秋天的色彩》的翻譯

(2008-10-09 16:09:27)

這篇短文的英譯經(jīng)北外李金達教授的的悉心打磨，可以幫你從中領(lǐng)悟翻譯之道——翻譯時選擇哪個詞、哪種句式、哪種語氣，為何做出取舍，這些翻譯的細節(jié)之處你都可在“注釋”中發(fā)現(xiàn)。

秋天的色彩

——維也納老人生活一瞥

Splendor of the fall

--A Glimpse at the Life of Senior Viennese

注釋：

1 “秋天”：fall，如in the fall of 2008，又如美國大學(xué)的Fall Quarter即秋季班，另外fall也給人以“晚年”的聯(lián)想。

2 “色彩”：譯成splendor(光輝，光彩)，給人一種很有希望的的感覺。

3 “一瞥”：即眼前一閃而過，a glimpse (a brief, incomplete view)，如a glimpse of Shanghai(上海一瞥)。

和許多發(fā)達城市一樣，維也納也早就進入了老齡社會。應(yīng)該說，在奧地利這樣的高福利國家，老人們起碼的生活來源是不用擔(dān)心的。包羅萬象的社會福利系統(tǒng)給老人們提供了許多方便。除了名目各異的津貼與保險之外，還有各種各樣的優(yōu)惠，如乘火車，參觀博物館，聽歌劇等等，都會因為您是老人而折扣收費。這些優(yōu)惠甚至還擴展到了來奧地利的外國老年旅游者。只要他們出示必要的身份證明，完全可以和奧地利老年公民享受同等待遇。

Like many other metropolises in the world, Vienna has entered an old-age society. I must say, in a country with high social welfare benefits like Austria, aged people needn't worry about their primary needs of livelihood. The all-embracing social welfare system facilitates people in their advanced age. In addition to the subsidies and insurances of every description, there are other favors such as travelling by train, visiting museums and attending operas at cut prices all on account of your old age. Such favors are also extended to aged visiting tourists to Austria. They only have to produce their ID or other corresponding certificates and they will enjoy the same privileges like their Austrian counterparts.

注釋：

1 “發(fā)達城市”：在英語中不說developed cities，應(yīng)譯成metropolises(大都會)。

2 “應(yīng)該說”：I must say，是插入語，常見于英語口語中，意即“我是這么想的，你不一定完全同意我的看法”。

3 “在奧地利這樣的高福利國家”：“高福利”是“國家”的定語，但不能放在名詞前面，而是作為介詞短語后置作定語，in a country with high social welfare benefits like Austria。

4 “起碼的”：即基本的、主要的，primary和essential都可，也可以用basic或elementary，不過檔次低了點兒。

5 “生活來源”：生計、生存，過日子，livelihood，needs of livelihood指生活必需品。

6 “包羅萬象”：即什么都包括在內(nèi)的，因此all-embracing、all-inclusive均可。

7 “提供了許多方便”：切勿把“方便”譯成convenience，而應(yīng)用facilitate (make easier, aid, assist)。

8 “都會因為”：all on account of...復(fù)合介詞，跟because of同義，前者多半用于正面肯定，如on account of one's old age/seniority/rich experience等，而后者用于負面、責(zé)怪較多，如The football match was cancelled because of rain.

9 “來奧地利的外國老年旅游者”：“外國”不必也不應(yīng)翻譯，因為到奧地利旅游的一定是外國人，所以visiting tourists to Austria即可。

然而，我們知道，衣食無憂僅僅是生活的一個方面，人們對生活的要求是多側(cè)面的，文明程度越高，人們的心理需求就越高。尤其是老年人，他們和青年人一樣，也有文化的需要，娛樂的需要，尊嚴的需要，成就感的需要，更何況他們已經(jīng)走過了生命的大部分歷程。他們要在生命的最后一個階段活得更加舒心，活得更有色彩。在維也納的日子里，我們見到的老年人，好像都生活得有滋有味的。我常常會被他們所感染。我由衷地敬佩他們積極的生活態(tài)度，我尤其欣賞他們那開朗的精神狀態(tài)。因為我們語言不通，我無法和他們更深入地交流，我只能將我所看到的情景和場面白描似地記錄下來。

Yet, we all know that supply of provisions and clothing is only one aspect of life; man's demand on life is many-sided. Higher the civilization, higher is man's psychological aspiration. This is especially true of old folks. Like young people, they have the need of cultural life, the need of recreation and amusement, the need of dignity and the need of accomplishment. Besides, having traversed greater part of their lives and unwilling to leave behind too many regrets, they want to, in their remaining years, make their lives easier and more substantial. During my stay in Vienna, I found that all the elderly people I met with seemed to enjoy their lives enormously. Contagiously, I couldn't help admiring them for their positive attitude toward life, especially their optimism. Because of the language barrier I could not go deep into our conversation. So, all I could do is record what I saw then and there in sketch forms.

注釋：

1 “衣食無憂”：直譯是not having to worry about...，但往下就接不上了，還不如從正面切入，譯成supply of provisions and clothing為好。

2 “他們已經(jīng)走過了......，享受同等待遇”：counterpart指“相對應(yīng)的人;對手方”，如Chinese Foreign Minister Li Zhaoxing met his American counterpart Powell in New York。

3 “被他們所感染”：可別譯成I was infected by them，人家還以為你得了傳染病呢。contagious表示“有感染力的”，如contagious laughter。

一天，我又漫步走進了一家古董店，毫無目的地瀏覽著各種奇奇怪怪的古玩意兒。往店堂深處走時我突然發(fā)現(xiàn)此店的收銀員是一位老太太。我無法知道是什么原因使這位老婦人在應(yīng)該頤養(yǎng)天年的歲數(shù)還在充當上班族，我只知道一眼看去這位老婦人是喜歡這份工作的，而且也完全能夠勝任這份工作。只見她全神貫注，手指在收銀機的鍵盤上利索地摁動著，每結(jié)完一份帳，便會抬起頭來對著顧客微微一笑，沒有一顆牙的嘴笑起來有點滑稽也有點天真，但相當有趣。我不由自主地在她身邊停了下來。我突然發(fā)現(xiàn)這位老婦人坐在收銀臺上和這家古董店的情調(diào)是那么的和諧，說不定正是這家商店用以招徠顧客的特殊手段。我是帶著許多問號離開這家商店的，因為我覺得這位老婦人和這家古董店肯定有著一段很有意思的故事，只可惜我聽不到了。

One day, I strolled into an old curiosity shop where I browsed the antiques on display. As I walked further into the store, I found, to my great surprise, that the cashier behind the register turned out to be an old woman. I can never understand what has driven this old woman to join the rank of wage earners at an age when she should take life easy and enjoy the few days she had left with her. All I know is that I could tell at first sight she apparently enjoyed what she was doing, and was competent for the job. Her concentration of mind, her skillful handling of the cash register and her faint, naive yet somewhat facetious smile from behind her toothless mouth after the settlement of each account was simply amusing. Somehow I halted beside her. Only then did I discover in what perfect harmony the old woman behind the cashier's register was with the antique shop. It can very well be a trick employed to attract customers. With many questions unasked I left that store, for somehow I was convinced there must be something intriguing between this old woman and the old curiosity shop. How I wish I could hear it all!

注釋：

1 “瀏覽”：即隨便看看，翻閱(書刊等)，browse (to look through or over casually)。

2 “突然發(fā)現(xiàn)......是一位老太太”：表達出乎意料的含義，turn out to be an old woman。

3 “上班族”：wage earner(靠掙工資生活的人)，“族”即階層，“上班族”即rank of wage earners。

4 “全神貫注，手指在收銀機......，抬起頭來......”：在原文中這是三個獨立的句子，直譯出來又長又不順，把它們譯成三個名詞短語就緊湊多了，全句謂語是“相當有趣”。

5 “結(jié)完一份帳”：settle(結(jié)算、結(jié)帳);account(賬)。

6 “只可惜我聽不到了”：這是個虛擬嘆句，即我要是能聽他們說說這里面的奧秘該多好啊!(How I wish I could hear it all!)